kevinKirkpatrick

Not dead!

2008-10-12T22:36:00.001-06:00

Vanity Project...

By Kevin Kirkpatrick

Book Preview

Summer is over.

2007-08-26T02:15:00.001-06:00

You know what that means

To Sum It All Up...

2007-07-31T20:17:00.001-06:00

I sent this E-Mail to Joel, and I think it expresses my feelings on Daft Punk quite well:

Dude, I was in the largest HMV in Canada and I couldn't find the Iron and Wine CD I wanted!!! How retarded is that? I ended up buying an embarassing amount of movies though (all great ones, rest assured).

and yeah!!! the show was soooooooooooo killlllerrr!!!!! I've been telling everyone "It was like a religious experience... But without the religion" Which totally sums it up perfectly! I was super close to their mountain of lights, it was CRAZY!!!!!! I actually saw Daft Punk with my own two eyes!!!!

For the last like 15 minutes, I went to the very very back, to the top of the bleachers or whatever, and I would have rather been there the whole show, the view was AMAZING! There was a huge sea of at LEAST 3000 people!!! SO surreal!!! There was this girl standing up there with me, and we started dancing together and it was great!!! SO amazing!

I almost regret going, because any concert I go to after this will immediately be less enjoyable than it could have been. All because of Daft Punk.

I am turning into Ermin Webster.

2007-07-27T18:43:00.000-06:00

Keep an eye on http://www.youtube.com/ffunyman for the duration of this weekend. I'll be too busy to post up the videos on this blog as I go along.

Daft Punk this Sunday!

Daft E-Mail

2007-07-27T17:38:00.001-06:00

It's Summertime

2007-07-07T17:28:00.000-06:00

A look around Swift Current.
This is my first try at colour-correcting the finished product. I still think some of the shots are a wee too dark.

Song is "It's Summertime" by The Flaming Lips

http://www.flaminglips.com/

untitled swift current project

2007-06-29T18:48:00.000-06:00

Bleach Bypass REMIX

2007-06-25T03:25:00.000-06:00

Took some of my old videos and threw a bunch a filters and effects at 'em in hopes of achieving a cool look. What do you think?

I followed this tutorial here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcWBIcbhMRo

The song used is "Oh Yeah" by Daft Punk.

http://www.daftpunk.com

So Today At Work... (Part 2)

2007-06-18T22:25:00.000-06:00

Exposition: When you take someone's money at drive thru, you have to press 'cash', and then it goes off the screen. I was taking an order to the window, and the order was still on the screen.

Me: Hey, have you paid?
Asshole: Of course I've fucking paid! What the fuck do you think I'm sitting here for?
Me: Well I didn't take your money, how do I know?
Asshole: Well of course you've got to fucking pay before you get your fucking food!

*Snatches bag out of my hand*

Me: What's your problem?
Asshole: FUCK YOU!
*Drives away*

The Future

2007-06-13T17:39:00.000-06:00

The Future is an electronic noise experience chronicling the past year of artist Kevin Kirkpatrick. In one year you can find yourself, and realize what's important. You can put it all behind you, and open yourself up to the world and it's infinite possibilities.

How are we defined if not by our past? What prospects are laid before us without the graciousness of the future? This is how we find out who we are, by what we've done and where we're going.

The future is what you make of it. Learn. Experience. Discover.

Coming July 29th, 2007

I didn't know which side to root for.

2007-05-31T18:08:00.001-06:00

Last night I had a dream the entire cast of Heroes was battling two giant robots over control of A&W.

A Stretch.

2007-05-28T21:02:00.001-06:00

Likes: Returning to your bed after getting up and finding it still nice and warm, and falling back to sleep.

Dislikes: Having a workplace that is so unorganized that you don't know if you're working at 7 am or 7 pm.

So Today At Work...

2007-05-27T22:49:00.001-06:00

..I made someone laugh so hard their nose started bleeding.

Hilarious Anecdote

2007-05-16T01:05:00.000-06:00

Reference to something seemingly ordinary during my regular day that quickly and uproariously goes astray and turns into something un-ordinary and irregular.

Close with clever witticism and sarcastic insight.

Your new version of Blogger is ready!

2006-12-26T16:42:00.000-06:00

The new version of Blogger now has all the original features you're used to, plus new post labels, drag-and-drop template editing, and privacy controls. And, it's a lot more reliable.

After you switch you'll need to sign in with your Google Account, but your blogs will stay the same. Their content and layout will not change.

Switch to the new version »

I got this message awhile ago, and it's still there. Refusing to leave my sight until I succumb to their wishes. I refuse to! I feel I'm getting along just peachy keen without these new shiny fancy options they have for me. Be gone foul message! Except I can't make it go away, it will continue to be an eyesore. I am just too stubborn and conservative for my own good somedays.

Today I ran into who was the last person I wanted to meet. And by run into I really mean, I didn't make eye contact or acknowledge him in the slightest, but he still managed to anger me to no end. Great. Good self control there.

I also embarassed myself on the phone with a girl, but I'll try and not be too obsessing about it. So far I'm not doing a good job, as that call was made like 7 hours ago.

Christmas was great, I got some super stellar presents. This year it was definately quality over quantity, which suited me just fine. I got some books I've been wanting a LOT, Scene It?, and a shaver. Not too stoked on the shaver situation when I get back to Calgary, 'cause I always made fun of brandon wiebe for owning one.

Highlights of the past coupla days: my uncles friggin DELICIOUS sasuage he made himself. I've never had anything like it, out of this world. Making my little cousin a bunk bed in the middle of the night as a present from Santa, and while doing that dropping a plank of wood on the fish tank and breaking it and having to salvage the fish without waking him up; wow. Watching my grandparents' old 8mm film with the rest of the family. And buying some stellar movies on boxing day; today!

that's all for now. More as this develops.

The Show Must Go On...

2006-11-26T01:23:00.000-06:00

...rocked! The play was great, I enjoyed it very much. Good job y'all! You blew me away. My only wish was wanting to see it again and again and again.

Today (saturday) I hung out with the group, and had a gay old time. We made two couch speed up videos, of which were a metric ton of fun! I've been having a really good time since being here, just loving it. I stayed at the cast party for about four hours and forty minutes longer than I had intended, but I don't think that people minded near as much as I was afraid of (I hope). I was afraid I was gonna give off that vibe like "he's such a loser in calgary that he has to come six hours to go to a party" or some crapola like that. But whatev! I'm told Andrew Martinoski was watching me across the room and doing that thing where he was talking "for" me, and making apparently hilarious remarks! Sweet!
Dillon Riel was the life of the part, as usual. Trying to orchestrate the crowd to sing to Boulevard of Broken Dreams was a definite highlight. Right on.
I got to teach a lot of people the ol' pop and lock, which was rad.

I find that going back like that, EVERYONE suddenly wants to hear your life story. No one really seemed particularly interested in what I wanted to be before I left high school, but now that's all they want to hear about. You're pretty much obligated to have at least a fifteen minute conversation about yourself to EVERYONE.

I'mma wrap this up, I need some sleeping. To reiterate - great play, great time, great friends, not-so-great for wanting to go back to calgary. That last one didn't make sense, but that's ok.

K out!

I know Devon still reads this, at least.

2006-10-14T14:41:00.000-06:00

I've decided this will officially be the blog I post on while in Swift, while keeping Zombie Mayhem seperate, and only post on that while in Calgary. I'm not actually in Swift right now, but I had this epiphany and I just had to announce it. So this still won't be updated for a time. But I will be updated it. Certainly no sooner than November, at least.

Ok bye!

'the haps'

2006-06-08T18:43:00.000-06:00

certainly not in the mood to blog. I have too much homework!

EDIT: I saw this on my feb 6 post

"A recent girl I've taken an interest in is seeming to take an interest in me. "

Who in the world was I talking about? I'm such a loser.

"Keep the change, yah filthy animal."

2006-05-29T22:51:00.000-06:00

Well gang, my last shift is this up-and-coming saturday, and I'm super stoked. I don't know how enthused I am about going to West Bank this summer, but I'm sure I'll have a fun time. At the very least I'll still be able to go canoeing everyday. The school installed some anti-theft walk-through things, and I've never seen such poor quality. These things are clunky and unnecesarily huge. The worst of it is that they emit a super high shriek that it seems not many people can hear, EXCEPT ME. I could never see why people couldn't sign books out anyways, it's in no way an inconvenience. If you were going to be late for a class, you could just tell the teacher for the next class "I was late because I was signing out a book." No big deal!

I'm actually super-excited for the final band and choir performances.

I've also decided on a release date for The Best Of... It's whenever everyone gives me their pictures for my album and my album is complete. Because so far I have a grand total of ZERO.

and to end on that note, farewell!

Update!

2006-05-26T10:27:00.000-06:00

Major breakthrough in the making of The Best Of. I'd have to admit, it was looking pretty bleak. In order to ensure your complete confidence in me, here is the opening to The Best Of. Never mind the 'official' part, this is still liable to change. Especially after I realized that I had accidently omitted some people. By accident, I assure you.

The Official Opening to The Best Of

Never mind the horrible quality, both audio- and video-wise.

Title

2006-05-21T23:05:00.000-06:00

This is the only reason I'm excited to live in Calgary next year:

I first went to Denny's, one week ago. Everything at Denny's is the greatest thing ever. The food was super good, it was cheap, there was so much of it, the staff were friendly and it had a great atmosphere to it. Even the view was nice!

My initial experience with Denny's led me to go there three more times that day. I can not wait to go to Denny's every day and spend my student loan there.

You stink

2006-03-12T00:53:00.000-06:00

I'm going to blog about my fabulous day at Gregory Muszkie's house.

The end.

untitled

2006-02-19T03:22:00.000-06:00

3:19, drinking a 2 litre pepsi that's two thirds finished by now, eating a doughnut in one hand while i'm typing this. a bag of munchies to my left, and tucker max. now i'm going to finally leave this computer and watch wallace and gromit.

THIS IS THE BEST BREAK EVER

Why spend your life making someone else's dreams?

2006-02-06T22:54:00.000-06:00

10 things of recent happenstance that demand noting:

1. The new semester is in full swing, and it's lookin' pretty awesome. Except for info pro 10. I HATE it!!! Don't get me on why I'm taking that class, I don't like to think about it.

2. I auditioned today. I went in saying I wasn't going to hold back because it was my last audition of effing high school! I mucked up a few lines, but I didn't get embarassed at all. I think they liked my reading for the Escape From Nemotex one better.

3. This weekend I went to Calgary for SAIT's open house. And it is the school for me, I swear. I'm willing to do anything to go to that school. Upon telling someone this, they asked if the only way I could get to that school was to lick Mr. Thingelstad's balls, would I? I said yes.

4. I've gotten a whole wack of new movies recently. Some I got at Calgary, one was a super late Christmas present from the Girl of My Dreams, and the other was one I ordered from the Internet. I wish I had like a thousand dollars to spend at the HMV in Calgary, they had the sweetest box sets you could possibly imagine. Every Ed Wood movie. Every Stanly Kubrick movie. Every Alfred Hitchcock movie. The list goes on, baby!

5. A recent girl I've taken an interest in is seeming to take an interest in me. I sound like such a huge loser always talking about girls like this, but it's just the way I am. Hopefully more as this develops.

6. I'm sure CPT would be way better if we didn't have to STORYBOARD. I hate storyboarding.

7. I've got some solid script written for Sorbate and Skagway: Unleashed. It's looking really awesome, I'm really happy with it. For Sorbate and Skagway, I'm planning on just taking pictures with my camera, and printing them out. Imagine doing this ten years ago, it would be super costly.

8. ph34r

9. Ms. Selvig asked me to be the DJ at the drama dance party during regionals. I leaped at the oppurtunity.

10. I also applied at SAIT for machining also. Just because at open house all applications were for free, so I applied in the only other thing I think I could excel at.

That's all for now, kiddies!

Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb

2006-01-23T23:44:00.000-06:00

Finals are in swing! Unlike all you other suckers out there, this guy is sporting only ONE, count 'em, ONE final! Here's a list of all my world has consisted of lately:

-Working with Degrees, Minutes, Seconds
-Radian Measure
-Arc Length, Sector Area, Angular Speed & Linear Speed
-Graphs of Circular functions and their reciprocals
-Applications of circular functions
-solving right triangles (if they're already right, why do I have to solve them?)
-Cosine Law
-Sine Law
-Ambiguous case
-Areas of triangles
-8 fundamental identities
-reduction & cofunction & sum & difference & double angle & half angle identities
-the circle
-the parabloa
-the hyperbola
-the ellipse
-solving systems of equations
-application of conics

that and the wheel of time. what else could there be? See all you nerdlingers next semester, it'll be a race to see who sits beside me in CPT.

I'm a loser

2006-01-17T15:28:00.000-06:00

I've officially decided I'm a loser. And not a loser in the sense that everyone else would think, where I'm just not everybody, but a loser in that sense to. I can never seem to accomplish anything, and even the things that I'm most looking forward to I'll never be able to accomplish. I'm just going to work at A&W until I retire, stop talking to people who I don't know whether or not they're worth worrying about, and stop fantasizing about all this crap about maybe someday being a director. It's never going to happen, and it's just a kids dream. Sorbate and Skagway is off, the robot video is off, the best of is off, the play is off. Yep, I'm better off with never taking a risk and never trying to step out, and never leaving Swift Current or A&W.

2006-01-08T02:07:00.000-06:00

The unstained tower breaks and bends knee to the forgotten sign.
The seas rage, and stormclouds gather unseen.
Beyond the horizon, hidden fires swell, and serpents nestle in the bosom.
What was exalted is cast down; what was cast down is raised up.
Order burns to clear his path.

-The Prophecies of the Dragon
translation by Jeorad Manyard
Governer of the Province of Andor for
the High King, Artur Paendrag Tanreall

Holy simoleans! Only two more sleeps until school! I didn't come into this blog with anything in mind, just a little taste to let the Internet know I'm still alive. In fact, I can't think of anything so much that I'm just going to end it here with some more quotes from The Wheel of Time.

We are going to tickle some Aes Sedai under the chin, rescue a mule, and put a snip-nosed girl on the Lion Throne. Oh, yes. That's Aviendha. Don't look at her cross-wise or she'll try to cut your throat and probably slit her own by mistake.
-Mat Cauthon

Before I knew what was happening, I had a fistful of spears around my neck like a collar. I could have shaved myself with one sneeze.
-Mat Cauthon

I'll bet there's treasure inside.
-Mat Cauthon

Soon comes the day all shall be free.
Even you, and even me.
Soon comes the day all shall die.
Surely you, but never I.
-Padan Fain

Hope is like a piece of string when you're drowning. It just isn't enough to get you out by itself.
-Perrin Aybara

Rand is the one who's supposed to go mad, and here I am, talking to an axe!
-Perrin Aybara, to his axe

Only a battle lost is sadder than a battle won.
-Rand al'Thor

Come against me, if you dare! I am the storm! Come if you dare, Shai'tan! I am the Dragon Reborn!
-Rand al'Thor

I trust you like a brother. Until the day you betray me.
-Rand al'Thor

I can rest when I'm dead.
-Rand al'Thor

I like reading erotica, sometimes.
-Robert Jordan

Told yah so.

2005-12-21T09:22:00.000-06:00

Please excuse the poor quality, I had to make it low so I could easily host it. Also, I'm using an unfamiliar codec so I'm not sure how well it will work for you. If it doesn't; tough.

EDIT:

Actually click here

Also, because it was such a nice site, I'm going to refer all of you to putfile.com for any hosting you may need.

Too bad I won't be able to really accomplish much else until school starts up again, eh?

EDIT AGAIN: The file is 10mb. It's big, so give it some time. If I hadn't compressed it, it would've been 101mb, so be glad it's where it's at. Patience is a virtue.

(none)

2005-12-20T23:35:00.000-06:00

"Too Long"

It's been much too long, I feel it comming on
The feeling is getting strong
It's been much too long, I feel it comming on
The feeling is in my bones

Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it
Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it

At last the long wait is over
the weight is off my shoulder
I'm taking all control
My mind is set so free

I'm where I want to be
To get the best of me

Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it
Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it

I see, you feel the way I do, the feeling all so true
the good feelings coming thru
My mind is set so free
I'm where I want to be, to get the best of me

Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it
Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it

It's been much too long, I feel it comming on
The feeling is getting strong
It's been much too long, I feel it comming on
The feeling is in my bones

Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it
Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it

At last the long wait is over
the weight is off my shoulder
I'm taking all control yeah
My mind is set so free
I'm where I want to be
To get the best of me

Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it
Too long, can you feel it, too long, oh can you feel it

You know you need it, I need it too
you know you need it, it's good for you
We're gonna move
You know you need it, I need it too
you know you need it

It's good for you

You know it's been awhile, when I go to type in the address to my blog, and it doesn't even pop down to help me out.

Well for all you people who have asked me to update, today's your lucky day. Not only am I updating today, but I'm also updating tomorrow with a Christmas present for all you people begging for something to show for The Best Of. I don't know what the hosting situation is going to be like, so it might just be a race to see who's lucky enough to see it. I'm pretty excited to show you all, as I'm double sure half of you forget what I'm even talking about.

Here's a list of recent complaints I have:
1. Girls

And thus concludes my list, and my update. Until a month later!

"it rocked my balls off"

2005-11-07T22:13:00.000-06:00

10 things of recent happenstance that demand noting:

1. This one time in math class, all those idiots who sit on one side of the room who laugh like a cliche (I'm not looking up the proper e for that), kept laughing on and on and on. And usually it's annoying because I can hear it through my headphones THAT PRACTICALLY HAVE PILLOWS SURROUNDING THE SPEAKERS, SPEAKERS THAT ARE LIKE TWO BOOM BOXES ON EITHER SIDE OF MY HEAD, but my batteries died and I had to deal with it full-force. But this day, Courtney says, "Curtis, you need to talk less, and math more."

GOLDEN BABY!!!

I'm not really sure if it shut that idiot up though.

2. This other time in math class, Courtney made fun of the way the abovementioned idiots laughed by doing it really loudly, and no one a) laughed or b) got it (I'm swaying for the latter). and I laughed my head off, thinking it was hilarious. I later tried to make eye-contact with Courtney so I could give her a thumbs up and mouth the word "awesome" or something, but to no avail. Two things about math and Courtney in a row? It won't happen again.

3. I was playing Worms Armageddon against Joel tonight, and I pulled this super awesome-innovative-ingenious move out of nowhere and one the game. Joel then told me to put that on 'the blog' to which I said ok.

4. I watched Napolean Dynamite with commentary last night and I learned something really hilarious about it, but it's not funny if I type it, or tell it. I must show.

5. my DVD collection is now at 86. I've got to reach the 100 mark... I've.. got to...

6. I don't think I've mentioned Land of the Dead on this blog yet... it rocked my balls off.

7. Knife of Dreams by Robert Jordan was AWESOME!!! Man, I'm so totally stoked for the last book, I can't believe how much that series rocks.

8. I'm actually pretty excited to work this friday, I get paid twice my wage for the holiday factor.

9. My English speech today beat everybody's I'm sure. I'm glad I didn't have to follow me.

10. The directors in drama never notice me ever. And today one of them noticed something I do all the time and got on my case, which made me really pissy, thoughts of walking out on drama have crossed my minds more than once with the recent disrespect I've been getting. But I'm just gonna tough it out I guess.

that's it for now, sleep is beckoning.

I have a blog?

2005-10-30T23:06:00.000-06:00

It's been much much much too long dear reader. Nothing new on the Darren Doane front if any of you were wondering. Drama's started. I have all of November off of work so I'm in love with that. Christmas is coming and I'm pre-excited for it. The other day I woke up completely convinced that Christmas was only a few days away and I was freaking out because I don't have any presents for my friends and I had no idea what to get them. Since I have a job it looks like I have no excuse BUT to buy a lot of good presents this year. It's (hopefully) my last year here, so I see no reason why not too. Joel gets a double because I forgot to get him a birthday present. Everyone's getting one this year! Even people I used to like but not anymore. Except brandon wiebe.

Tomorrow's Hallowe'en! Excited! I'm being dressed as Edward D. Wood Jr. For those of the uninformed, Ed Wood has been voted The Worst Director of All Time. Easy concept. It's late, so I hope you enjoyed this snippet for the first time in a long time. I have to do a camera dump to make room for Hallowe'en pictures, so I'll put some of the ones I've been compiling up here soon, there are some gooders! They'd have to be to make it this far. I have ones from SLC and Mission: Impossible.

Off to bed! Sweet dreams! Sweet dreams!

manohman

2005-10-05T23:21:00.000-06:00

Ok, I really did have an Internet surprise lined up for you and everything, but blogging is getting to be less and less an important the less I post. Good or bad? I don't know. I've decided that for the Best Of video (A DVD compilation of all the sketches we've done in the past year, due date october 16th), no one is getting that deal I had lined up. The one where you get a dollar off for every video you feature in. I was also thinking of giving a copy to Emily and Devon for their party, but I decided against that. If they wanted a free copy bad enough, they would have made it with me. Instead of waiting to get it for free. Everyone must pay ten bucks! It's cheap, I assure you! At an estimated hour and forty-five minutes worth of entertainment, ten dollars is a steal! We sold nixon. for five bucks and it was only half an hour long with all the bonus features included.

Ah, but I do ramble on. Now to the reason I actually decided to start posting.

Have any of you ever heard of Darren Doane? Yes? No? Yes? Yes? No? He's probably made a music video for every band you've ever (and never) heard of. This man has been a direct influence on my decision to pursue a career in film. All this praise is directed to this foxy individual:

I found his myspace account (it's legit, I swear. He said what the address was in his commentary for HIS best of), and I hit him up with this message:

Dude, I can't believe how awesome you are. You're a direct influence on what I do. Thanks alot.

and he actually REPLIED to me! Albeit in two months later, but he's a busy man after all;

Forget my work, what are you working on! Hit me back and show me what you have been up to.

Darren

Darren Doane cares about his fans. I didn't reply because I was scared that I might make a fool of myself in front of my hero. I eventuall sent him this about a month later, including a cheesy reason why I didn't reply straight-aways.

Right now my pardner [that's you Joel] and I are working on making about a forty-five minute short of a giant robot terrorizing our city. To do this we're dressing someone up in a costume and having him stomping on a scale model of our downtown, intercut with shots of actual downtown with people panicking.

And on top of that, my friends and I sporadicaly decide to shoot sketches and skits. We've been doing this for the past year and I've decided to make a DVD compilation of the best of. Release date is the 16th and so I'm working crunch time. I'm in my grade 12 year so I'n really learning how to manage my time.

Man, I can't believe I got a reply from you, I wish I had checked my inbox sooner. Thanks for making my month!

-kevinKirkpatrick

I realize now that I spelled sporadically incorrect. I was too excited.

And so I completely forgot about this. However; today I got a reply! Here it is...

You gotta get me a copy of the project when its done. Id love to see it! My address is

[you're crazy if you think I'm givin' that one away!]

Hit me back and keep me posted!

Darren

So now that cycle has started again where I'm scared to IM him back. Where I am right now it would just be a repeat of before, so I don't want to bore the man, he's got music videos to shoot. So I'm going to wait a bit until I have something worthwhile, yah know?

That's it for now. Enjoi.

a thousand monkeys typing on a thousand typewriters

2005-09-29T21:47:00.000-06:00

but seriously folks, Internet surprise comin' this Friday! That's tomorrow! Wait and see!

na-NO!

2005-09-25T01:12:00.000-06:00

so I forgot about the 'contest' I was holding. I've held off buying a nano for a bit now. I'll do it later, I swear. But seeing as all the suggestions just weren't good enough, I decided that no one won. I'm sorry to dispoint and be very anti-climatic, but that's the way it has to be.

This morning I was too much in a hurry to shave, even though I really needed it. So right now I'm cutting my facial hair with scissors. Just ordinary scissors. I'm going to try to get back in the habit of showering every day instead of every other day, and usually every third day. It's for the better I think. By wednesday expect an Internet surprise.

Joel, when was the last time we hung out? It seems forever. And you owe me $500.

abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor

2005-09-11T01:09:00.000-06:00

So I'm going to buy this, and with it I can get an engraving on the back for free. I now poise this question to the public: What should I put on it? Start an open petition on me comments and give me all your ideas. Two lines, with 23 characters on each line. I would really like the first line to be 'kevinKirkpatrick' and the second line a witty zinger about myself. I originally wanted the second line to say 'Studmuffin extraordinaire', but it was too long. The winner of the contest shall win a copy of the next video Joel and I produce, whatever it may end up being. Not Sorbate and Skagway. Assuming that none of the suggestions suck. Contest closes in 8 days (Monday, September 19th).

Thanks in advance and good luck to all!

Edit: Just remembered today is September 11th. Well how about that.

...give it to us!

2005-09-08T19:56:00.000-06:00

After working at A&W for too long, you start to understand what they mean when they say humans are a creature of habit. Nothing better fits that description than doing the same thing a thousand times each day, and eventually developing your own techniques that you think are better suiting and somehow are superior to the ways other people do them. Now take folding rags. You wouldn't assume anyone could grow attached to having a certain way to do something even involving a rag. Unless you're one of those people. The attribute of folding a rag is something I cling onto, because it gives me thoughts of "man, other people, when they take a rag, they just fold it any which-way. If only they knew the right way to do it, they could be wiping way more efficiently and not having to stop and refold the rag when they're on a wiping rampage."

I'm not joking.

So I bring to you dear reader, the Coveted Form of Folding Rags.

Let's start off with your typical A&W rag:

The most common mistake I see in the A&W work enviroment is this; making the first fold a hotdog-fold

BIG. MISTAKE.

The first fold is crucial, make the first fold a hamburger-fold. You won't regret it.

I know the temptation is great, but keep folding it hamburger style.

One more and you're home free...

There it is! Doesn't it look lurvely?

Here's a diploma of recognition...

If you ever want to apply at an A&W, simply present this certificate and you're a guaranteed shoe-in. GUAR-ANTEED.

P.S. And Brittany, PLEASE tell me there's something new to report on the China Lily? I'm not even joking when I say I'm literally craving it. It sounds like I'm trying to emphasize the joke by enforcing that I actually am chemically dependant, but with a straight face I can honestly tell you I'm in withdrawal. Anything at all?

such pretty skin...

2005-09-04T23:54:00.000-06:00

Today rocked; except for two minor things that I don't want to think about because today rocked too much to think about them.

Today I went to Regina to help my sister move into her campus, at around 5 I went to my buddy's apartment and hung out with his band and got the pants danced off me in playing dance dance revolution. Also, since my sister is gone, I now have unlimited access to my car, without having to share it because of stupid schedules conflicting and all that lame stuff. So I can sleep in and have fun.

I saw fireworks today.

And to top it all off; this evening I was just doing whatever on the Internet, and I found this site:

http://www.newmediacampus.com

and I pretty much swear this course was made solely for me. To see what I mean, click Events, and since I want to go into digital film, click for that. Read, and feel jealous that I've found the perfect thing for me.

So now when people ask me what I'm doing next year, I'll finally have a real aswer.

131

2005-09-03T01:32:00.000-06:00

~~The Girl of my Dreams~~

Guest Entry the second by FUZZY BLUMPKIN****

2005-09-01T10:32:00.001-06:00

And thus begins the final year of high school. If these are "the best years of my life", then just kill me now. Really, if life in general doesn't improve drastically after graduation, what's the point. Wow, that sounded like I have a death wish... Which I don't.... Yeeessss....

The End.

****Name has been changed to hide identity!!!!!!!!!

The Dire Case of Soya Sauce

2005-08-29T21:34:00.000-06:00

I don't know about all you people who read this, but where has all the good soya sauce gone to? And by 'all the good soya sauce', I really mean; China Lily. Where is it? These past weeks you may have seen me wandering the aisles of every grocery store in Swift Current, looking lost and seemingly having no purpose. Inside I'm screaming for the China Lily to reveal itself. When I went to Calgary on vacation with the family, I even went to grocery stores there to try and find some but to no avail. Where could it have gone? China Lily has been a staple in my diet for the past 17 years. Who knew it would ever stop existing? There was a crisis like this a few months ago but I guess the companies fixed it or something because it soon came back. Now the crisis is hear again. It is now beyong the realm of my control. I'd have to find a substitute.

So now my fridge is filled with full bottles minus one serving of any soya sauce I could get my craving hands on. Rice will never be the same. Neither will chicken breasts, fish, ribs, pork chops, or broccoli. I decided to take the case straight to the Internet. Who knew all my questions and concerns would be solved in the first result that Google gave me?

bliss

Albert & Wright

2005-08-28T00:39:00.000-06:00

I decided just to skip the last post of the series so I can move onto this other series I've been thinking about doing for a while now. This one certainly won't be daily, they'll just have relevance to each other. In this series it will involve me telling stories in the workplace. Lame I know, but I have to tell them to someone. Even if it is the Internet.

Before I really start going, I have to introduce you to all of the characters I work with(I don't consider them coworkers).

The Managers

Whitman - He has the build of someone in a wheelchair. Super small legs, normal-like sized body. Plays online poker during his shift and I've never seen him do any work. But don't let them know I told you that.

Bauer - Father of David. He's pretty reliable on giving all the bitch work to the new guys. I'm the second newest guy so that means I don't have to do dishes when I work with the new guy, Eric.

Byron - I thought this guy was like 20 at first, but I guess he's like 25. Actually I have no idea why I think that. I'm just going to stick with around 25. He's pretty competent in giving the bitch work to the more incompetent people. Like Justin.

The Supervisors/Part-Time Managers

Rick - Super nice guy, today I found out he's 30. Has the dirstiest bald spot I've ever seen. He should never not wear a hat. Laughs at everything. Not hysterically or anything, he just gives a few hearty ha's after pretty much every other sentence.

Dara - She works front mostly, but every now and again she'll come to he back and help out. I owe her two dollars.

Liona - Works front. I've only ever dealt with her once and I thought she was a bitch, hard. And that's all I ever hear from everyone else.

The Front

Chris - "The British Guy". I get him to say bollocks and pahk the cah in hahvahd yahd. I'm determined to get him to talk in an Australian accent and say "let's throw another shrimp on the barby". Swears a lot, likes good movies, knows where it's at.

Bev - Daugher of Grandma. Joel puts it best: "There's only funny Bev, or angry Bev. There is no in-between." Grandma is her mother.

Lacey - Referred to by Joel and I as Catgirl. One time when she was like eight, she was mad at her parents, so she got a buthcer knife, and cut up their cat. She tells us about how she puts hamsters in the microwave and watches them melt. I have no pity for her and I tell her to shut up when she tries to talk to me about stuff not work-related.

Nadia - Super nice, she likes to tell jokes, which is always a nice attribute to any person. One time I made a pun with her name and I called her The Chronicles of Nadia. But she didn't get it. Whatever.

Amanda - Apologizes profusely over everything. From what I gather, she has a messed up family of sorts. But I don't gather much.

Joel - Joel Dryden? Joel Kenneth Dryden???

Shaundel - I don't really know who this is. I think she's blonde.

Korbyn - The new person up front. Sometimes when I share breaks with her, she won't talk to me or anything, just stare at the clock until twenty minutes passes and so I'm reduced to reading the same FHM magazine I've read time and time again.

Tiffany - She can make any normal conversation awkward. When I share breaks with her, I'm the one who doesn't talk, I just don't make eye contact and read the FHM magazine.

Jacky - Uuuh, she's red-headed. She was in intensive care last week and we all signed a card. Reportedly she thought what I wrote was hilarious. But that's another story.

Charlene - No idea who this is. Seriously, no clue. The name sounds familiar but that's it.

The Back

Evelyn - Refered to as Grandma. I don't think I've ever heard her called by her real name. Grandma is roughly the age as human thought. She knows more about A&W than A&W does. Officially labeled as a "lifer".

Eric - The new guy. Really cool guy. Used to be super shy and reserved but now that he's more comfortable he talks more. He makes fun of the people everyone else does.

Dave - Son of Bauer. Hilarious. Always good for a laugh. He's the one who starts all the workplace jokes that people constantly refer back to.

Andrew - He's just another guy. Hard worker. Likes a good laugh. Makes a bunch of sexual innuendos. What can I say?

Penny - Sisters with Joleen. We'll get to her. Penny's ok. She asked me once if Kacey and I were going out.

Joleen - Seriously, if you ever say anything to this girl, bet your money on her saying "what?". Also, if you walk past her or do something that isn't standing perfectly still staring into space, she'll go "ah!". Incompetency is a dish best served Joleen.

Vicky - She lied about her age so she could work here. That was probably back in the 50's for all I know. She's another lifer. I always see her making onion rings and all she talks about his how she's always behind every day and about how many onion rings we used the other day. I thought she didn't really mind it but I found out a bit ago that she hates doing it.

Sam - Never talk to her, the only times I've worked with her is when I'm like five minutes early. Apparently she's really stubborn.

Me - lol

The In-Betweeners(People who alternate between front and back)

JT - Big fellow. Big as a lummox, really. He knows the ins and outs. He works at movie gallery too so sometimes I don't see him around for a while. OK guy, he has a different style of humour than me so sometimes we irritate each others.

Harder - Brandon Harder. You should know 'im. Drunkie. Womanizer. Loves fireworks. Drives with one hand on the wheel.

PJ - I purposefully save PJ and Justin last. These two are on opposite ends of the teenage boy stereotype spectrum. PJ is tall, broad shoulders, good-looking, intelligent, he knows a lot of things you wouldn't expect. Every move he makes has a purpose. Whereas on the other side we have...

Justin - Small, geeky. Has glasses. Greasy hair. Acne. Tells jokes that no one thinks is funny, not even himself. Barely competent. Just barely. It looks like half the time he doesn't know what he's doing, and he twitches out a lot. Lots of people call him Potter saying he looks like Harry Potter. The only similiarities are the black hair and glasses, I really don't see it at all. One time I had to cover a shift for him because his car wouldn't start. BS, I say.

So now that I have all those personalities out of the way, when I tell you tales of my work, you won't be so in the dark and I won't have to desribe to you why it's funny or why it's not.

EDIT: I added stuff on the descriptions and some spelling and punctuation crap. Not really worth a re-read.

fourteen one thousand...

2005-08-21T21:39:00.000-06:00

Calgary update:

Well I'm here in my hotel updating my blog how many kilometers away from my home. I'm such a nerd. Calgary's ok. I'm sure it wouldbe better if there weren't any other cars on the road. And if I could travel at supersonic speeds. Man that would rule. I woudl be all like, vrooom.

Notes of interest

I would say that there are more hot girls here than there are girls in Swift Current. Furthermore, I think there are more hot asian girls here than there are girls in Swift Current under the age of 83. I heard some dude talking in some language or other and he would say some things that I could get like 'McDonalds' and 'Saddledome', but in the middle of what I would assume to be a sentence, I hear him say 'the New York Rangers suck. They suck!'.

I've taken some pictures, I'll probably post one or two up here once I get home.

ok bye!

thirteen one thousand...

2005-08-20T00:11:00.000-06:00

Saturday and Sunday I'm in Calgary, so unless I go to some swank internet cafe or something, I won't be updating any further. Just in case you would have wondered.

twelve one thousand...

2005-08-19T00:30:00.000-06:00

Welcome to today's anatomy. On this version we have the deleted scene(i.e.-meg=rotten chicken). Seriously though folks, don't you think Rufus Wainwright... i do. Hey, cats don't dance. Ash-Lee's birthday is tomorrow. Don't tell me what to do. It's actually today. Happy birthday Spartacus! This just in: summer lasts forever. The world cancelled school forever. Don't you wish? lol

Ok now cabbage patch kids are eating my hair! uh-oh! Nadia how much do I love you? James's hair is ticklish. I don't remember what I was going to say. No! are ytou wuping your nose on my shirt? I'm not going to fix any more errors I make hwile typing fromnow on. Let's see how I do. Leaveit to beaver. Today I thik Brrent Isaac yeled at me and he was in a red car. What do yout hink of nose jobs? Peace out. No, peace is in. Tune in to mynext post, which is an unfortunate number.

the. end.

eleven one thousand...

2005-08-17T00:41:00.000-06:00

I have to nothing left to entertain you masses. Flee, get out of here. While I rot away in my self-made blog prison. Four more days... Four more days...

ten one thousand...

2005-08-15T00:15:00.000-06:00

I have to take what feels like a seriously huge crap right now. So I have in my one hand a stopwatch, and in my other hand... well I'm typing with my other hand. So nothing I guess. From the time I leave this chair to once I sit back down again(on this chair). Okay... GO!

...

ONE MINUTE AND TWENTY-FIVE POINT THREE SECONDS!!! YEEEEEE-HAW!

nine one thousand...

2005-08-13T03:23:00.000-06:00

I'm offically hooked onto The Apprentice.

eight one thousand...

2005-08-10T23:41:00.000-06:00

These fifteen posts sure aren't going to fly by if I skip two (or was it three?) days without a thought. Here's a list of things that happened from Sunday until Wednesday Evening

Sunday
-Woke up
-listened to Daft Punk
-Ate
-Worked from 10-6
-Slept
-Woke up
-Bathed
-Brushed teeth
-Listened to Daft Punk
-Picked up The Girl Of My Dreams from the bus station and we hung out for the night
-Watched a buncha movies with The Girl Of My Dreams
-Listened to Daft Punk
-Slept

Monday
-Woke up
-Listened to Daft Punk
-Ate
-Crapped
-Ate
-Went on a hike
-Drove The Girl Of My Dreams to Lac Pelletier, spent the day at Camp Lemieux. Was forced to spend the night sharing a tent with some guy I've never met because of poor weather conditions.
-Eventually slept

Tuesday
-Woke up most ungraciously
-Most assuredly did NOT listen to Daft Punk
-Ate breakfast
-Painstakingly left camp
-Hung out with Joel, of whom had just gotten back from Calgary the night before
-We both went to work from 4-11
-Both went to James's and chit-chatted until... 12? or sometime.
-Listened to Daft Punk
-Slept

Wednesday
-Slept
-Woke up
-Bathed AND listened to Daft Punk
-Almost went back to sleep
-Made pancakes
-Ate
-Did stuff on the computer
-Watched movies
-Bought movies, bought books
-Ate
-Watched movies
-Shot some footage of CFS practicing
-Bob and I then went to TH's and then my house to watch Miami Ink
-Took Bob home
-Here I am.

okay bye1

seven one thousand...

2005-08-06T23:43:00.000-06:00

I have nothing to post right now. I'm just doing this so the 15-day spree is over sooner. Today at work I gave them my two weeks notice. Maybe I'll regret it.

tra la laaa!

six one thousand...

2005-08-05T00:52:00.000-06:00

Usually it's this time at night when girls tell me all about their troubles. Even the gross ones...

But onto the pictures!!!

In the middle of the pit...

Fathers, hide your daughters.

Lastly, here's an exclusive 'in' for Sorbate and Skagway promotional-wise. It's not worth putting on the blog until I've got a picture of Skagway to match. So here for your pleasure is a robust looking Sorbate:

five one thousand...

2005-08-03T16:21:00.000-06:00

I seriously thought my last post would take ten minutes to do. It took me over and hour and a half. This is a filler post until tomorrow's post where I shall include pictures of me kissing individual members of Norma Jean. The band. Also I shall include a hawt picture of me without a shirt. I have to find a way out of my shift on Sunday for an unprecedented surprise. A surprise of which I won't tell a one of you what it entails until the day is here. But I'm looking forward to it a lot.

four one thousand...

2005-08-02T04:48:00.000-06:00

I've always thought it was bad Internet cred to post a comment on your own blog. Sometimes someone will say something I really want to address, but I decide not to in order to keep my figurehead strong. I figured I will reply to all the comments I've ever wanted to reply to on this post right here. I'll probably never do this again.

The First Candidate:

If you take good, clear pictures of S&S related things - I could make you a blog layout featuring them if you want

You wouldn't have to use it of course - but it's worth a try.

By Eusdon

I would love for you to do this. I have too much on my plate as it is. I shall talk with you in real life about this in detail.

Do you think maybe the unproductive guy and the cat killer had something to do with you throwing up? Just thought I'd throw that out there.

By courtneymay

No, it was completely unprovoked. I thought I had made that clear.

The Third Candidate:

don't worry too much about the cat-killer flirting thing. i mean, if she's doing to you what i think she is- she's done that to justin. and not even J.T. - yes, the other justin :(

By jacketpotato

I don't know if I would have been more pleased if it had been J.T.

The Fourth Candidate:

Yes!

By Eusdon

Thanks for all the positive feedback.

The Fifth Candidate:

You have a riveting web log and undoubtedly
must have atypical & quiescent potential for
your intended readership. May I suggest that
you do everything in your power to honor
your Designer/Architect as well as your audience.
Please remember to never restrict anyone's
opportunities for ascertaining uninterrupted
existence for their quintessence.

There is a time for everything, a season for every
activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time
to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest. A time
to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and
a time to rebuild. A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance. A time to
scatter stones and a time to gather stones. A time
to embrace and a time to turn away. A time to
search and a time to lose. A time to keep and
a time to throw away. A time to tear and a time
to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak
up. A time to love and a time to hate. A time for
war and a time for peace.

Best wishes for continued ascendancy,

Howdy
Editor

'Thought & Humor'
Cyber-Humor & Cyber-Thought
http://ilovehowdy.blogspot.com/
Harvard Humor Club
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Harvard_Humor_Club/

By "Thought and Humour"

Why don't you just write my blog for me?

The Sixth Candidate:

holy crow Kevin...that was kind of scary. Just a side note, Brittany once in awhile says the whole awww, muffin thing; I am sure this blogg wasn't direct at her for that instance...was it?

By Kalin

Whoa, obsessive-protective much?

The Seventh Candidate:

Who is this dream girl Kevin...I hope you get this dream girl of yours.

By Kalin

Sigh, I could prattle on forever about her. Well, probably five minutes until I saw you getting creeped out by how much I love her and then stop. I hope so too.

The Eight Candidate:

My favorite part, you caulky little thing you:
well I must say I'm the most awesome person I know, so that's reason enough right there
But it did make me laugh however, as this person probably didn't understand half of the things you typed to him.

By Britt

Are you to say that I am a filling or sealing used to ensure corners and window frames are airtight and not let the warm air seep out, thus losing me money in heating my house?

The Ninth Candidate:

Oh...I feel for you Kevin and you mystery dumper must enjoy that considering you seem to always walk among the clog.

By Kalin

Whoa, what?

Amidst my searching for comments I could comment on, I found that I have indeed, commented on my very own blog. I'm sure I did it with a heavy heart, and I had a guilty sleep that night.

Exhibit One:

Well originally Willy Wonka was originally going to be played by Marilyn Manson.Willy Wonka is supposed to be hugely eccentric anyways. I think the clip just showed a scarcity of it.

By kevinKirkpatrick

Exhibit Two:

Jill: Well it's quite understandable, I more often than not leave a cynical comment.
I made that link before I made that post I believe, it's not a cheap shot at you. There was a picture of my cousin lying on the desk in front of me, and so I just got a random baby picture off of Google.

Ash-Lee: It's looking pretty unlikely, I think I'm just going to make a new account after I get a friend of mine to try and remove any spyware off of this thing.

By kevinKirkpatrick

Exhibit Three:

My cohort is obviosuly reffering to the aptly titled "Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn". Which everyone who reads this should see. Right about... NOW!

Hey, I just received a new e-mail message yet again! This time from Tickle/Emode.

By kevinKirkpatrick

Exhibit Four:

You know, ONE "ha" would of sufficed.
NOW TELL ME YOU'RE JOKING!!!

By kevinKirkpatrick

Exhibits Five, Six, and Seven:

I have no idea who you are.

By kevinKirkpatrick

This post has been removed by the author.

By kevinKirkpatrick

You're such a good deriver Joel. (Maybe it's comments like that which make 'everyone' in school think we're a gay couple) Not driver though.

By kevinKirkpatrick

I actually did this next comment with full knowledge of my Internet cred being on the line. But it was for a post so long ago, and I don't think anyone knows what post. I'm putting it on here anyways in case someone finds it later and think I missed it.

Exhibit Eight:

Looking back at this post, I have no idea what I was talking about.

By kevinKirkpatrick

Oh, and;

SHUT YOUR DAMN DOG UP! HOW THE HELL IS ANYONE EXPECTED TO SLEEP??? IT'S 4:48 AM FOR CRAP'S SAKE!!!

three one thousand...

2005-07-30T00:39:00.000-06:00

Sounds of the Underground was teh roxorz!

I can't believe it, don't even get me started. I'll post some pictures for sure later when I'm on my own computer. Currently I'm in Luke's grandpa's condo. Luke is watching Family Guy behind me. Luke's grandpa is the man, and he has a l33t machine. I got a metric buttload of merch. I'll go more in depth later. I gotsta go. bye bye.

two one thousand...

2005-07-29T07:20:00.000-06:00

SOUNDS OF THE UNDERGROUND HERE I COME BABY, WOO!!!!!

with love,
-kevinKirkpatrick

one one thousand...

2005-07-28T00:41:00.000-06:00

I decided I need to get back in the blogging mood. So for the next 15 days, if I'm in access to a computer, I will post a blog even if it will end up being worse than the worst post I've ever made. Which is probably the Passion of the Christ one. What the crap was I talkin' about in that? I dunno.

Okay, here we go, gonna make it, first post, let's roll, alright, first of fifteen, I can do this, nothin' to it, take it as it comes.

*crickets*

So uh, I heard a car alarm go off about an hour ago...

And yes, I did get the idea from Joel's "The Daily Enquirer" series of posts.

edit: CLICK ON THIS LINK RIGHT NOW

Two interesting

2005-07-26T00:43:00.000-06:00

Two interesting things to point out about my day at work today;

1) This guy was really cheesing me off and I almost yelled at him for being unproductive. Look at what work has reduced me to! I've succumbed to The Man! Luckily, I just gave a him a sharp what-for. Then I just ignored all his terrible, terrible jokes for the rest of the night. Not that I didn't ignore them before I got mad at him.

2) I was bending over to pick up a case of buns, when out of nowhere, completely unprovoked, I hadn't even seen this coming a mile away; I threw up inside my mouth. It was at a moment where everywhere around me everyone was hurrying to do something because we had a crapload of customers. And I just stood there with a horrified look on my face, with my cheeks puffed out. So I very calmly walked to the sink and threw up in it, and then went to the front and got a glass of water and rinsed my mouth and went back to work. Weird.

Also, this girl who killed her cat when she was like ten because she was mad is flirting with me. I don't want to shut her down outright because she frikkin' killed a cat when she was ten because she was mad! How does a girl like that deal with rejection? So I just give her a rambuncous "whatya think yer doin'?"

Unlike Joel, I'll probably talk about my work a lot.

g33k

2005-07-14T02:16:00.000-06:00

List 5 reasons you are a dork. And make them good reasons. Justify them. Explain them. Be loud and proud of how big a dork you are! Then pick the 5 biggest dorks you know and have them do the meme.

1) Tonight I ditched out early on hanging out with a bunch of friends and I came home and sat in front of the computer and now I'm doing this at 2:21 in the morning.

2) I read books and watch movies that no one's ever heard of, but that doesn't stop me from being able to talk about either subject for an entire evening to someone who has never read/seen them and I will still not be satisfied.

3) There's this girl, and whenever I'm referring to her, I always call her The Girl of My Dreams. She doesn't know I call her this.

4) I've never had a girlfriend.

5) I've been on online forums and followed threads and read them for usually a year before I get tired of them, but never posting once. Also I still write in this blog although I'm sure only four people (including me) read it.

-Joel Dryden
-Luke Fritzke
-This one guy named Justin who I work with.
-Dillon Riell
-Mr. Quiring

Well I thought it was worth posting about

2005-07-10T00:40:00.000-06:00

Warning: Not a fun video to watch.

http://www.kentuckyfriedcruelty.com/anderson-vid.asp?c=11

I guess

2005-07-07T14:01:00.000-06:00

I guess I work at A&W now. First shift in about an hour. It should be ok I suppose. Since I got my digital camera, I'm going to do a pictures of the week sorta thing. Although I won't do it every week like religion, it will just be something to do on the computer. I'll keep you, the reader, up to date on this as it progresses. This is turning out to be a weak post, I'll add some more stuff on this when my shift is over probably (no idea when that will be).

So I

2005-07-06T13:58:00.000-06:00

So I hear that there's a trailer out for The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. I've probably never been more excited for a movie ever before. I'm including Land of the Dead, Return of the King, Shaun of the Dead, and even Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow into consideration when I say that. I've literally been looking forward to this movie for two and a half years. I haven't watched the trailer, and I'm not planning on it. I want to go into the movie with a media blackout on this one.

I did, however watch the trailer for King Kong. Looks good, although I didn't know Jack Black was going to be in it, he does look like he's doing a good job. I never really had anything against him, just that all his characters seemed to reflect himself and therefore all were alike. Except for King Kong, Jack Black himself doesn't seem to be shining through Carl Denham. Keeping in mind that you can't get a whole lot from just a trailer.

I've got to run, hope you enjoyed my movie ramblings that at least portray that I might know what I'm talking about.

Edit: oooh

It never fails

2005-06-30T19:54:00.000-06:00

I could whine a lot right now but I'm not gunna.

Why don't I just start a whole blog where all I do is list things?

2005-06-27T19:20:00.000-06:00

Things I love
- this analogy: "my mouth dropped to the floor faster than donovon bailey."
- Daft Punk
- Dance music
- Zombies (duh)
- The Wheel of Time
- machining the obsolete style, yo!
- my digital camera
- any kind of camera
- any kind of camera alternative
- music
- my birthday
- Norma Jean
- awesome trailers for movies (only I may determine which trailer is awesome and which isn't)
- The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
- this blog

things I hate
- palindromesemordnilap
- the term "that's hot"
- House of Wax
- people who hate Swift Current

that was starting to become too much like my 100th post it seemed to me.
"In Soviet Russia, blogs write you!"

a follow-up

2005-06-24T21:31:00.000-06:00

here's a follow up to my post re: my braces;

This is the result of two and a half years of my life...

One of Many

2005-06-22T17:56:00.000-06:00

I really didn't want to dwell on this anymore than I wanted to (which was not at all) but this had to be addressed...

The Big One Seven

2005-06-22T10:21:00.000-06:00

Today's my birthday!

Sadly

2005-06-19T16:11:00.000-06:00

Sadly, this has been the highlight of my day.

http://www.myspace.com/weebospace

I knew he would have one soon, because Luke has one. I've tried to stop making fun of him on my blog, really I have. Maybe he'll find this blog and never bring it up with me but tell everyone else how he feels about it and when I hear about it I'll laugh and then two months later when he finally talks to me about it, I'll be beyond caring about anything with him ever.

I've gone from never typing his name with capitals to not even mentioning his name.
"At least with pessimism you won't be let down" or something like that. Here's a quote from me.

"SHUT UP AND STOP WHINING, do you think everyone who likes me now liked me before? They surely wouldn't have begun to like me if I had underrated them and called them on everything they said. So stop whining about not having any friends. If you really wanted friends, you would actually go get them. You must not want friends if this is what you do."

My philosophy? (take note fanboys) If you want it, you can attain it. You must not want it enough if you're willing to ever give up or if you just whine about something not happening to you. Maybe I'll go more into depth on this later. It's not quite as cut and dry as that, I do have it all mapped out on my head, I've just never had to explain my life outlook. Another post!

2005-06-18T08:57:00.000-06:00

My braces and I are free!
My braces and I are free!
I dance up and down the streets with glee!
For my braces and I are free!

Guess who's coming out with a CD this week?

2005-06-06T20:15:00.000-06:00

That's right, me! I'm coming out with a CD this week!

These babies are being sold for a paltry $5! This CD includes over 20 songs, which will eventually equal out to over 45 minutes of music created by me! Right now the count is four pages of artwork done by your friendly, neighbourhood Ash-Lee Hommy, so you're guaranteed quality! I'm not copping out on the packaging neither, this all comes with a Jewel CD case. I'm not just burning these babies and handing them out.

$5 is a steal!
[/plug]

Release date to come. All you really need to know is that it's come out THIS WEEK! Get yours!

100 things

2005-06-03T18:40:00.000-06:00

100 things

join us...

2005-05-19T16:07:00.000-06:00

Here's a list of movies I want to see that are coming up pretty soon.

-Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith(which I'm seeing tonight!!!)
-Fantastic Four
-Corpse Bride
-Charlie and the Choclate Factory
-Batman Begins
-War of the Worlds
-Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy(Swift Current hasn't gotten it yet D: )
-NOT Madagascar
-Undead (kind of)
-The Pink Panther
-The Wedding Chrashers? Maybe? I need to look into that a bit more
-The Legend of Zorro a little bit
-Kung Fu Hustle a teeensy bit
-The Man Who Copied
-The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (If it ever makes it)
-The $6, 000, 000 Man

and while I'm at it, here's some that aren't coming out real soon, but I really want to see.
-The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe
-Wallace and Gromit
-Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire(even though I haven't seen Prisoner of Azkaban yet)
-Evil Dead 4(I have no idea when this is coming out, I've jsut heard rumours, really)

LAND OF THE DEAD TRAILER!!!

numanuma biznitches

2005-05-12T16:45:00.000-06:00

Today I found out my braces come off on June the 18th, hurray one million!!!

Things I should take note of because if I don't have them down somewhere, I'll forget all of them
-At 6:30 I get a family tour of the frikkin' huge Credit Union.
-Tonight I'm watching 28 Days Later with Ash-Lee, Joel and James. My three favourite!
-I've got three assignments for history. One's due tomorrow, one huge one is due on tuesday. I'm thinking about changing topics also, which is hardly the time to be doing this but I'm in a slump. The last is due next friday.
-Physics project I'm not ready for is tomorrow. We'll see how my group does tonight.
-Friday I want to edit some of the video Joel and I are making during the lunch hour. We'll see if I have time.
-Friday I'm going to Eastside Church of God to chillax with some homefries.
-Saturday is the long-awaited cast party! Can't wait, that'll be rad. Joel and I are getting some crowd shots done there for our up-and-coming video.
-Saturday during the day Joel and I have to get a photography camera from somewhere and take pictures with it for the video again.
-Also during Saturday I have to record the voice-over for the video.
-Monday I want to work on editing the video some more.
-Brunch with my family sometime this weekend
-yard work, the kind of which includes putting weedkiller stuff on the lawn, and raking up all the small twigs left from us cutting the tree down.
-May 23rd show yo, gonna throw some fists in the pit!

That's all for now. Hope you enjoyed that. I expect two of everyone to attend the show. Inquire within

Holy Schmidt! Zombism!
http://65.127.124.62/south_asia/4483241.stm.htm

we'd ask them often...

2005-04-24T20:41:00.000-06:00

I filled out a survey for Gmail the other day, and this was one of the questions...

clickie

A say-wha?

2005-04-21T19:22:00.000-06:00

The time is: 7:15 PM
Right this instant I am: Filling out a camp application and talking to Joel. And making a blog, but that would be redundant to say. Oh well.
One day from now I was: At Trailview Alliance Church when I didn't really want to be there.
Three days from now I was: At James's watching I Heart Huckabees.
Five days from now I was: Just winning an award for making music for drama.
A week from now I was: At Rosetown, performing our play.
A month from now I was: Giving Devin Hennig some of my mom's Jello 1-2-3
A year from now I was: Probably filling out a camp application as well. Two weeks ago I'd be at a Metallica concert.

Sorry for the filler post. All of these are dead accurate to. Cool how that worked out.

2005-04-03T17:30:00.000-06:00

Yesterday was my blogs one year anniversary! I think the only think I've been this consistent at is being male. In honour of my blogs birthday, I went to a Throwdown show. Holy frick was it awesome! I wish I could do a decent job putting it into words, but here's a review as best I can do(rhyme not intended).

-The first band was All That Remains. So good. I couldn't believe them, just too rad. They knew what they were doing, went through their whole set super tight and blew me away. Breakdowns sounded like something was exploding and my testicles were drawing up I was so amazed.

-The second band was Throwdown, they were why I went to this show. Throwdown man, oh man Throwdown. Throwdown oh man. Two things that are totally with mentioning:
1)I got to sing in the breakdown of a song. I actually knew the words, so that was mean.
2)On the last song I got punched in the face so hard one of my contacts fell out. Frickin' eh!

-The last band was As I Lay Dying. By that time, I was hungry, tired, thirsty, had a twisted headache, in pain, and no money. But I was still blown away. I didn't spend any time in the mosh at all for the last set of the night, but that didn't impede on me enjoying them. At some points, my hair was being blown back, I coould see the amps wobbling, the cartilidge in my neck was being forced back, it was frikkin' awesome.

I don't feel like giving a rundown of the day, as my arms and head and neck and back are hurting right now, and it's been pretty enduring up to now. Perhaps later? Probably not, don't get your hopes up about that. Toodle-ooh.

Lately this...

2005-03-31T02:00:00.000-06:00

Lately this past little while, I've either been feeling really happy on life and ready to go rippin' and rarin' away, or I've been feeling really lethargic and I don't and I'll take everything seriously and try not to talk as much as I can. When I'm feeling really happy I don't want to sit and stare at a lightbulb while pressing a bunch of buttons to tell people how happy I'm feeling, and when I'm sad I don't want to bring people down by talking about my lame problems.

So that's been my life for the past two or three weeks. Here's a rundown of what I did today...
-Dropped off some recyclables
-Dropped off clothes at Salvation Army
-Bought some brown sugar and milk for my mom's baking
-Made music on my computer and guitar (which reminds me I have to update my dmusic... I'll do it tomorrow)
-When I was around town, I ran into Savannah and Shawna, and we drove around some more, Savannah took pictures of me in the park for her photography class or something.
-Played guitar in the park
-Helped my dad fix the dryer
-Went to Dairy Queen with the Holderbeins's, Ian Klaasen, and the Schellenburgs (I know I spelled that wrong...)
-Went to Jesse's and played video games from 10pm until ten to one.

Here's what I want to do tomorrow... (or later today, if you care to be technical)
-Make some videos with James, Allie, and Joel. P'raps Luke as well, if allowing.
-Play guitar in the park some more, that was loads of fun today, the weather is supposed to be gorgeous
-I want to spend as little time on the computer as possible, so I'll upload those songs, and that'll be it until the late late evening rolls around, like now.
-Bathe

...oh, and, I also got the Norma Jean cd yesterday! fa-rickin' eh! It's totally a wicked rad CD, I'm not regretting it at all. I'm starting to like some different styles of music, so I've got to buy more of those kind.
i.e. The Mars Volta

Throwdown in LESS THAN TWO DAYS!

My Weekend

2005-03-27T21:36:00.001-06:00

Saturday

10:20 AM - After alot of mini-adventures taking place before our travels, we are at last on the road. These adventures included me getting some books and CDs from Joel, filling up with gas, making faces at a little boy, and lastly, my sister buying cigarettes. My travel kit includes; toothbrush, discman, deoderant.
And my mom just gave me a box of candy... I dont know why? But I guess you can count that if you must.

11:05 AM - Still driving, Once again I'm sitting on the side where the sun is shining. I'm so frikin' hot right now, I can hardly hold this pencil my hand is so sweaty... Reading Lion Witch and the Wardrobe... Listening to Prozzak. Oh great, we angled off more and I have to endure even more sun.

2:28 PM - Not too long ago we passed through Moose Jaw after stopping at the local Wal-Mart. I had some good ol' fashioned McDonalds. I just finished and continuing to read Prince Caspian, and now I'm listening to UnderOath. The sun's not as bad anymore.

3:45 PM - Arrived at my grandma and grandpa Kirkpatrick's. We're watching some speedskating. I guessed a certain person would win and they did. Pretty tired from the road, might take a nap.

5:55 PM - I had that nap, just woke up. It was a pretty unelegant sleep, I just splayed on the most inconvenient spot on the floor in the living room. Time for a supper I'm not hungry for.

6:25 PM - Supper's over

7:15 PM - Watching Sister Act 2 on TBS in the basement now. The jokes are just too predictable. I like all the supporting nuns, Whoopi Goldberg is ugh... pressing. All the teenagers are so typical, but I guess that's the result of adults who are probably afraid of America's youth writing scripts. TBS's commercials blow too. Rehashes of Seinfeld jokes.

9:00 PM - We left the grandparents's, after I made them wait so I could see the end of Sister Act 2. Whoopi Goldberg won.

9:45 PM - Arrived at grandpma and grandpa Switzer's.

10:00 PM - Sitting between two middle-aged women crackin' wise at my grandpa's music, my cousin gave me some sugar cookies and showed me his Easter eggs.

11:30 PM - About ten minutes ago, I was playing hide and seek with my cousin, and while I was counting, he tried hiding behind the curtains whilst standing on the window ledge and fell and cranked his head on a freaking marble table! Holy Crap! Somehow the child is a-ok. Hurray

Sunday

1:15 AM - Just finished watching Robin Hood on TV, going to bed now. Might read a bit beforehand though. It's Easter! Jesus has risen!

12:45 PM - Woke up at 10, watched my cousin find his easter candy. They didn't make it hard for him. Maybe it's because he's so short so the hiding places are limited. Right now my cousin and I are watching Robin Hood again. Oo-de-lally! Reading The Voyage of the Dawn Treader now.

2:38 PM - Just finished helping my grandma empty out one of the many closets filled with tons of nostalgic stuff. I found a whole flour sack filled with halloween costumes. I saw a particularly awesome costume and I said "that's rad" my grandma got a little hot under the collar and said, "No! They are not ratted!" So then I had to tell her what 'rad' meant.

4:25 PM - Just did some quading with my cousin, took him through some pretty sick mud puddles. Now I'm chillaxing inside and half-heartedly watching Bubble-Boy. the main actor sounds like Tobey Maguire, I wonder if he is. I'd believe it.

6:50 PM - Finished supper not too long ago. Absolutely awesome. I never get tired of my grandmother's holiday feasts. My cousin is playing with his yo-yo, but in order for it to work properly, he has to stand on the couch at it's end, and jump up and down. I was goin' to go out quading by my lonesome, but there's a cow calving right now so don't wanna unsettle it.

8:00 PM - Pulling out from my Grandparents's as I write this. It always takes a long time to say goodbye here. I gotta shut off the light in order for my dad to drive properly. It's almost too dark to write otherwise. Listening to From Autumn To Ashes, gonna try and snooze while I'm here.

9:23 PM - Pulled up in front of my house. My CD ended right when my dad put the car in park, which was cool.

9:37 PM - Amidst putting my stuff away, I find that this while time we were away, my bed was unmade! Good thing no one burgalized the place while we were gone and saw how messy my room looks because of it.

Enjoi

Tapped out (of ideas)

2005-03-25T21:44:00.000-06:00

It's been a stout three days since my last post, where I said I would get back to you on the prize for Brittany. Despite missing my mark, I still do not have a prize yet, nothing is coming to mind. I'll think of something soon here...

It got sprung on me today that for the weekend I'm going to the grandparents's. I won't be updating from there, they live out in the boonies like you wouldn't believe. I was told from my mother the other day that my grandpa has spent his entire life in the hosue he's in rightnow. Holy crap! That's so hard to comprehend, man oh man... He's 63 I believe. I know that he's retiring soon, moving to Moose Jaw. I don't think I could put myself in his situation, having to move to a new house, while abandoning his old one. He's leaving the house he's in now to his son/my uncle, if I recall correctly.

The clothes dryer is making some wicked noises right now, I wonder if it'll explode like my computer did that one time...(not kidding).
Today I fixed the door to the dishwasher, I felt pretty handyman-like. It was a good feeling since I got to help out my mom.

Have a great Easter weekend everyone!

oh no

2005-03-22T22:19:00.000-06:00

I just remembered I owe Brittany a gift for guessing the Brandon Healey thing... more on that tomorrow I suppose...

(yes I realize I'm putting two blogs on one day... I'm a fraud...)

hurray-ah for me-ah

2005-03-22T08:20:00.000-06:00

Today is a tuesday, and as far as tuesdays go, it's not going so far. Although today is still pretty young (it's 8:00 AM), I think I may have to take it as an omen.

Firstly, Joel's dad called and told me Joel was sick and not going to school so I was forced to go to school with my parents. I'm not against my parents or anything, it's just how my parents have a certain time to be at work, and in order for them to give me a ride it consequentally leads to them bringing me to school alot earlier.

Secondly, I'm frightfuly hungry. I didn't have time this morning in between my putting on clothes and making my bed, to grab something to eat. I'm a fright.

Thirdly, I used my dad's deoderant as I'm fresh out.

The bell just rang, and I might be on time! Thanks for bearing with me Constant Reader.

Bye-d-Bye

2005-03-20T00:13:00.000-06:00

Here's another example of how much my mom rules: Today she made her own recipe for Jello 1-2-3!!! How do you do that????

For the uninformed go here...

BOOMSHAKALKAPOSTMORTEMBUTTCRACKHATFACEROCKETSHIPGRINDCORExXx!!1one!on!e

I've been eating it like there's no tomorrow. Isn't there supposed to be like grounded up pig hooves in the crystals or something? Regardless, it tastes superb. P'raps I'll give some to my history teacher...

Hurray for my mom!

2005-03-19T14:26:00.000-06:00

My mom just made some banana/chocolate chip muffins, an all-time favourite. I was so filled with awesome when I finally had some after like a 4 month stretch without them.

I've added a metric buttload of new stuff on my dmusic site. The bulk of it being me and James Heinrichs making up songs on the spot. It's definately worth a look-see. Right now I have three or so songs in the works, including a revamp for an old one. So don't think I've quite lost steam yet.

James and I have been kicking around the idea of making a CD with all the songs being improv. Right now we're just at the stage to see wether or not we'll have enough consumer demand for it, and it's not looking quite so pretty. So stay tuned for that though!

I watched the movie Cry-Baby, featuring the combined talents of both Johnny Depp and Ricki Lake, last night. It pains me to say this to all you Johnny Depp fans, but it was lacking. I'm glad I wasn't in a postition where I would of had to make it. I'm sorry. ._.

As it stands I don't think it's mathematically possible for me to get 100 posts by april 2nd, unless I start doing some double posts some days, of which I think is lame. It's only a blog after all, not a chore. Lately my blogs had been getting increasingly worse anyways, so not being so hardpressed to reach a deadline will only increase quality.

That's all I got! Thanks for all your supporting comments I've been getting lately! ^_^
[/sarcasm]

EDIT: After double checking, it would be possible to get 100 posts by April 2nd. But still, don't really expect me to.

EPIC

2005-03-17T13:50:00.000-06:00

A IS FOR AWESOME
B IS FOR BLATANTLY AWESOME
C IS FOR CRAZY AWESOME
D IS FOR DEROGATORILY AWESOME
E IS FOR EXTREMELY AWESOME
F IS FOR FRIKKIN' AWESOME
G IS FOR GRANDLY AWESOME
H IS FOR HORRENDOUSLY AWESOME
I IS FOR INCREDIBLY AWESOME
J IS FOR JUST AWESOME
K IS FOR KEVIN IS AWESOME
L IS FOR LAVISHLY AWESOME
M IS FOR A MONOPOLY ON AWESOME
N IS FOR NEVER NOT AWESOME
O IS FOR OVERTLY AWESOME
P IS FOR PRETTY AWESOME
Q IS FOR QUACK AWESOME
R IS FOR RADICALLY AWESOME
S IS FOR SUPER AWESOME
T IS FOR TERRIFICLY AWESOME
U IS FOR UNBELIEVABLY AWESOME
V IS FOR VERY AWESOME
W IS FOR WONDERFULLY AWESOME
X IS FOR X-TREMELY AWESOME
Y IS FOR YOKO ONO IS NOT AWESOME
Z IS FOR ZUG.COM

I'm sorry for such a stupid post...

2005-03-14T17:53:00.000-06:00

Guest Entry by Champ Peters

wellladiesandgentlemen...

2005-03-14T17:40:00.000-06:00

Guest Blog from the author of the increasingly popular weblog, The Random Mind Exchange. plug

Question the first: So please explain, in your own words, why I am so awesome.

Well, the success to your awesomeness, I believe lies in your ability to type really fast and come up with cool random songs (For example Bang Bang by Nancy Sinatra). Seeing as I'm a fan of things that are random. wink ;) wink;)

Question the second: Hmm, good points all around. What would you say, is my most stunning attribute?

I'd have to say that youre most stnuning attribute is your ability to talk about yourself without ever getting tired.

Question the third: I can see you're a philosphical man. Out of all the world religions, what is your least favourite?

I would have to say that my least favourite of all the world religions would have to be pigmiasm. For the simple fact that they sacrifice a pig every day, which entails some sort of planning, not one bit of randomness.

Well that's stupid. Because of this stupid interview, I now wish I hadn't put the link to your blog at the beginning, as some people might have went to it not knowing how stupid you are. If you are someone who hasn't clicked the link yet, I strongly discourage against it.

It's too random for their strong minds!

Quiet, infidel!

Vultures In Vivid Colour

2005-03-11T15:45:00.000-06:00

Band of the day

underOath. I've been listening to them again after a hiatus without them.

Lyric of the day

-Oh what a shame that your/pockets did bleed on St. Valentine's/And you sat in a chair thinking/"Boy I'm such a Prince!"/Well life's a train that goes/from February on day by day/But its making a stop on April First
-So let it all go by looking at the sky/Wondering if there are clouds and stuff in hell

-April Fool's Day by Rufus Wainwright

Song of the day

Scapegoat by The Agony Scene. here you go

Possible CD I'm going to buy for today

The Vines - Winning Days
Green Day - American Idiot

Bands I intend to check out one of these days for today

Led Zeppelin, The Mars Volta, Ja Rule (or Jay-Z, I forget which), Nirvana, The Used, The Arcade Fire

Update of my life of the day

Tra laa. Not too much of much. Wrote some possible songs on my guitar, recorded and uploaded some new stuff for my dmusic site. Playing with the idea of actually getting a job when drama is done this time around. Strengthened some friendships. I'm trying to make conversations with people more meaningful. A quote I'm giving myself is to give three seperate compliments to three different people every day for as long as I can. I remember one time I went on a spree of giving out presents out of nowhere to people who mean tons to me but they don't even know it. I should do another one of those.I like the idea of having contests on my blog, that could be fun. I guess that ended up being a bit much. I'm feeling really happy as I write this.

That's all for now! Senseless poetry is on the horizon!

In Reference To A Sinking Ship

2005-03-10T17:00:00.000-06:00

"Master loves us, Master took the precious." "Master wants to keel us!"

"Shiiiiiiiire! Baggiiiiiiiiins!"

I shall give a prize to whoever guesses correctly the person saying these quotes by Gollum. Except James and Joel. Or Brandon Healey.

EDIT: The person saying it was actually none other than Brandon Healey before his voice changed! Brittany Singbeil wins the prize of which will be publicly revealed on the 15th!!!

Choke That Thief Called Dependancy

2005-03-09T20:30:00.000-06:00

Now for your viewing pleasure, I give you...

Glasses!

Oooh...

Aaah...

...and of course what would any portfolio be without none other than myself...

Avalanche In D Minor

2005-03-07T20:40:00.000-06:00

If any of you have forgotten the quota I've given myself, I'm aiming to get one hundred posts by April 2nd. April 2nd is the date of my blog's first birthday. :reflection: Ah, how the times have changed.

Today marks the first month anniversary between me and that oh-so-ever-adorable relationship everyone's expected to go through someday. I've never had a relationship of 'this kind' ever before, as I don't think many people knew. So far this has been the best month of my life, I don't think I would of made it if not for them. I hold them very dear to my heart. I'll admit it, I've even wrote some poems in commemoration of this certain relationship. As of today I have been wearing these pants for a month. Magical, isn't it?

I'll just go into some clarifications here so you don't immediately lunge into questions...
1) I have most assuredly been NOT wearing these pants for a month non-stop. I have a preference for sleeping without pants, as well as bathing.
2) I only washed them once. I was going to put some Febreze on every so often, but it continually slipped my mind.
3) I don't know if I'd ever do it again, it was quite the experience though. I recommend it to everybody. I do know that I'll never look at these pants the same again.
4) As for physical changes of the pants, the only thing I've noticed has been the ends are a little more frayed. The backpocket where my wallet goes is a little more defined(got to make it a little easier for the pickpockets).The pants in their entirety have changed to a different blue. I can't really think what kind of blue, the name for it just escapes me.

I'm an avid fan of rolling up my pant legs and adorning cuffs. Here's me putting my leg on my scanner to show you the comparison between my cuffs and the rest of my pants.

I also got some new glasses yesterday! I'll scan those and put them on my blog tomorrow. Until later...

2005-03-06T19:28:00.000-06:00

Guest Entry by Ash-Lee Hommy

"Make a poem about people who live in Vietnam, but are Chinese, but are mistaken for Vietnamese."

Sitting in an empty room,
my arms are made of clay.
I pick up this rubix cube,
and I begin to play.

My brother lives in Vietnam,
hey wait, so do I!
Sometime we are mistaken for being Vietnamese but really we're just Chinese and it gets really annoying because we might have to move to Canada, but then we could partake in things like meat pie and maple syrup cookies.

Ash-Lee Hommy

Copyright Ash-Lee Hommy © 2003

2005-03-05T06:45:00.000-06:00

on March 2nd expect a particularly awesome surprise!

Just kidding!

Today is the day I am doing my Lord of the Rings extended edition fest. So far I'm one and one half done. I think I'm going to have to souce out on the third one (I know it's the best one) seeing as it's just so gorgeous out.

"Thanks Kevin for that meaningless blog." "Well you know what?" "No Kevin, please elaborate, what?" "I think you're a pompous porpoise." "You don't really mean that, do you Kevin?" "I don't take back one word of it." "Kevin, after all we've been through, you feel the need to lash out to me in such a manner?" "I think my words speak for themselves." ":("

2005-03-01T12:43:00.000-06:00

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!XD

It's here! It's here! Hurrah! Hurray! Woo and yay!

...However, as it is, I probably won't end getting it for about a month. Man does Swift Current suck on these sorts of things.

And complaining doesn't make you king of anything.

...continued

2005-02-27T01:40:00.000-06:00

I thought of two new pet peeves today, which I thought I could add before anyone took notice, but you people had to like them so much. Here's the one I thought of today...

7. Whenever you see something and you don't understand why it's there, so you ask, "why is such-a-such thing there for?" and I guess there's some sort of spiritual intervention because someone ALWAYS has to come up with this blisteringly 'witty' reply; "Just to make you ask questions."

I mean, if you've EVER heard this once, it never bears repeating so long as your ear drums can withstand life after hearing it the first time. But oh no, there always has to be someone who was raised on the wit of doorknob who just HAS to give you no information -mostly because they don't know themselves- in the form of what has to be the ultimatum of idiocy. I've decided the next time I hear someone say this I'm going to build an atom splitter the size of New York City and aim it at this persons house. Which is probably not a house but a trailer with beer cans littered all over the floor alongside ripped out Hussler pages that are Scotch-taped onto the walls.

8. Sometimes when I hear a person giving a speech on how they don't want to live their lives or whatnot, and they'll say something along the lines of "I don't want to lead one of those lives where I have a house in suburbia, a sports car, a minivan and an SUV, a blonde wife with two and a half kids..." and some moronic person will laugh at this and say something like "TWO AND A HALF KIDS?!/1!?!?!!? HOW DO YOU HAVE HALF A KID???? I THINK YOU MADE A MISTAKE, HAHAHA WOW WAS THAT CLUMSY OF YOU!! OOPSIES!!!! EXPLAIN YOURSELF OUTTA THIS ONE!!! HAHAHAHA OH MAN, I DON'T THINK THAT'S POSSIBLE!!!"

Whenever I think back to that point of unparalleled asininity, I'll picture the person in question later in the day, eating a grease-ridden hamburger from a truck stop, while watching the latest OC episode, chuckling to themselves as they think back to how they totally showed that person up. At that point my imagination becomes infuriated at me for wasting it on something that deserves to be on 2 fast 2 furious and somehow starts incorporating zombies and ninjas.

That's all for this instant, but on March 2nd expect a particularly awesome surprise!

Pet Peeves

2005-02-25T21:16:00.000-06:00

If any of you have done these, I probably only pretend to be your friend.

1. When people are giving an explanation of themselves and they say "I like to have fun".

...Are you serious? Of course you like to have fun. Who doesn't like to have fun? Unless this person doesn't ever have fun because they lead a life where they try to do as little as possible and when they're actually having fun, it's a milestone, and a time to think back kindly on. And you can tell that they actually try to do as little as possible, if they're coming up with lines like 'I like to have fun' when they have to describe themselves.

2. When people say "just smile and nod".

Shut up, you aren't original.

3. When your birthday was like a week ago, and someone will ALWAYS say "happy belated birthday"(emphasis mine).

YOU ARE NOT THE FIRST PERSON TO SAY THIS AND YOU ARE STUPID AND YOUR MOTHER PROBABLY SLITS HER WRISTS BECAUSE AT ONE POINT YOU WERE GROWING INSIDE HER.
The people I usually hear this phrase from are the people who I'll never hear use 'belated' in any other context.

4. There's this one art poster in the school that says "Depression: The number one reason for teen suicide".

When I first read this I seriously wanted to burn down the school or rent a wrecking ball to wreck the building, and write a check that I wiped my butt with and charge it to the school administration.

First off(and I wish I didn't have to explain it as much as I do), is there any other reason behind suicide? The only idea that could come to my mind was if you were to do it by accident. Like if you were cleaning your gun... with your tongue.
But lo and behold, dictionary.com disproves even this theory...

su·i·cide (s-sd)
n.

The act or an instance of intentionally killing oneself.
One who commits suicide.

Secondly, why is it limiting itself to teen suicide? Maybe because the artist was narrowing their audience to teens and less likely to be found out that they deserve to somehow kill themselves without depression being a factor.

5. When people say a line they hear all the time, but don't know what it's from and they sound stupid and it makes me want to go back in time and step on a butterfly so that there's no chance of them ever coming to existence and no one will ever remember you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i.e.(and I don't mean Internet Explorer) When you are ready to tell a story to someone and you start it off by saying 'oh man, this one time...', and then someone will interupt you by saying "this one time, at band camp..." and then they look at you like they're funny and thought of that themselves(whereas by itself it doesn't make a lick of sense), SO JUST SHUT UP AND DON'T EVER SWALLOW OR SPIT YOUR SALIVA FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN BEFORE YOU DIE OR AT LEAST NEVER THINK ABOUT ME AGAIN BECAUSE I'LL DIE A HAPPY MAN IF THIS WERE TO OCCUR. The one person I have in mind where I'm typing this is A PREACHER'S DAUGHTER and she DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT MOVIE IT WAS OFF OF!!!@!2!@1!!! HOLY FRICK!!@!21@!1!!!! I asked her if she even knew what the closing joke on that line was and she didn't even know!!! Who do you think you are??? Holy crap I wanted to jump off the empire state building with a rope tied to my 'nads I was so overwhelmed with the stupidity of the situation.

6. When people say "aaaaw, muffin."

I think it's stupid, I can't believe how stupid it sounds. Usually the person saying it will laugh at themselves afterwards. I myself laugh at my jokes, because I think that everything I say or do is awesome, and most people can hardly grasp such an exponential degree of awesome at once, if at all. The difference here is that these people are not awesome. These people try to sound like a little kid, thinking that if what they're about to say won't be funny, they can make up for it by being cute.

SHUT
UP
YOU
ARENT
CUTE
WHEN
YOURE
STUPID
AND
I
BET
THE
CUTEST
YOUVE
EVER
BEEN
WAS
WHEN
YOUR
PARENTS
MISTOOK
YOU
FOR
DEAD
WHEN
YOU
WERE
BORN

Notice that most of these peeves started with 'when people say...' because people taken as a whole, I can't stand.
Well my blood pressure just went up about a hundred and fifty points(I don't know if that's alot or a little), I'm gonna go take a cold shower now.

75

2005-02-25T14:44:00.000-06:00

I realize that these last eight days must have been hell for all of you, without constant updates on my life, you must all be helter-skelter.

Hmm, what to say, what to say...

Well as you may not somehow know, we (being the school) registered for our classes for the up and coming 2005-2006 school year. I must say I'm pretty excited, as grade 12 is totally on the way and the next step after that is as you should know, college. The school has brought forth a slew of new classes, one of which includes the sort of thing that I intend to pursue for the rest of my life. So as you can guess, that has me pretty pumped and I'm looking forward for what my life has to offer.

10 things I learned in Time magazine today

2005-02-17T15:09:00.000-06:00

1. Kim Jong II has NUCLEAR WEAPONS?!??! HOLY CRAP!!! - I knew about this a weekish ago, but still, that's very discontenting. Time thinks that this only deserves about a two page article with a footnote on "Cracks in Kim's world", telling us that the problem will roll over after awhile.

2. The American military changed their uniforms for the first time in 22 years - It says there are 22 changes done on the uniform. But they only give me three! This is kind of interesting for once!

3. Picture of Howard Dean being a douchebag -
I don't even know who Howard Dean is.

4. Keanu Reeves is an introvert - If you pick up this copy of Time, you'll find alot of effort in trying to make Keanu Reeves seem like some suffered artist. Including another lame picture. Keanu Reeves gets an article almost as long as Kim Jong II.

5. It takes a star-nosed mole 0.23 seconds to eat one mouthful - These are are the ugliest things I've ever seen.

6. I finally figured out what The Gates were for in Central Park.

7. Female soldiers use their sexuality as an interrogation weapon - Yah umm... really weird article. Not really sure how I feel about this.

8. Two very unflattering pictures of both Jean Chretien and Paul Martin - No real surprise, Time always tries to make Canada look stupid. Take last week's magazine on Canada's medicare for instance.

9. Donnie Darko deserves the tag "cult classic" - No it doesn't.

10. Doctors in New York City encountered a patient whose immune system crashed within weeks of his initial HIV infection, a process that usually takes years. Possible new strain of the virus? - That's horribly discomforting.

All in all, Time magazine isn't that great. I don't know why my dad subscribes to it. I swear I don't go out of my way to read it either.

Post 73

2005-02-15T16:57:00.000-06:00

you are: the spin kick! You are dangerous when done
in a small space, people are scared crapless of
you!

Which moshpit move are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2005-02-13T18:33:00.000-06:00

Post 72

Today I had an interesting msn conversation with someone named...

'wutever.poisons.in.this.bottle.will.leaveme.brokn.sore.n.stiff.but.its *BREATH* the.genie.at.theBottom.im.suckin.at.He.owes.me.1.last.wish'.

I never thought I'd see the day where I'd meet someone who was less articulate than Brandon Wiebe on msn. But today was that day!

hi whos this
....
uuh I thin my msn name spells it out pretty nicely (my msn name was kevinKirkpatrick)
and by thin I really mean think
how u get mah msn
you gave it to me
today
this morning
where?
in Swift Current
ringing any bells?
uhh yeah its not jen thou im just confussed who you were
i knew she's outta town thou
what jenna do in swift current this morn
she was at the camp reunion I do declare
you goto that camp aswell
I used to, I was just visiting for old time's sake
ic, so jen was at the camp or w/e
or you guys goto into swift current?
yes
4?
what?
what go to swift current for
well I live in Swift Current
ic but why did she goto swift current i meant or w/e
anything interesting i was just wonderin
havn't talk to jen yet, just trying to see what kinda fun she was up ta
i told her to have a good time
so why was shee thurr?
she went to go to the camp reunion, as well as I, but I didn't know she would be thee. while I was there she gave me her email address.
oh ic
i thought u meant she went to swift current or w/e and seen you/ gave you her email
so i was puzzled why she was there, instead of za camp
man im a bored kid hah
haha well alright
what all do at the camp
/ what kinda stuff did she do or get to do
fun things or what
what kinda stuff go on when you were there sir
I was only there for like half the time. so I can't really give an accurate description of what all went on.
but yes, I think they were having fun at least
ahh
cool
she was happy correctomongo
?
well she got to see me, so what kind of girl wouldn't be happy?
hah
im sure she'll be even happier, to see me.
haaardly
how so
well I must say I'm the most awesome person I know, so that's reason enough right there
but sir, i transend the friendship bond farther then you with her, so wouldn't that make me more awesome
in her opinion?
hah iujno
i got nothing
but your her friend
and who are you?
mbb
what is that supposed to mean?
you asked who i am
and i said mbb
so i guess its my name?
your name is mbb?
no but thats what you can call me
many of others already do.
jen for instance.
well im off to work
goodbye
what the crap just happened?

I felt bad talking to this person throughout, it felt like I was making fun of a handicapped person or something. I mean, 'what go to swift current for'? Are you kidding me? Good heavens. Some people's children.

2005-02-12T17:53:00.000-06:00

This is post 71 since I started my blog which was on April 2nd 2004. That means my blog will be one year old in 50 days. I'm hoping to reach 100 posts on that date. Just thought I'd give myself some sort of goal in life.

Today I made a certain girl a birthday present to top all birthday presents. I recorded, mixed, and printed off a CD just for her. I thought it would take like 45 minutes of dedication to see me through it all, but it actually took about an hour and a half. I lost my vision sometime through it all because it actually fell short a little bit in it's intended aweseomeness.

I hope she enjoys it. I wouldn't be able to live with myself is she didn't *crushed*!

2005-02-10T13:27:00.000-06:00

I am in the physics computer lab as I write this. I have Fiona Lubega (like the mambo no. 5 guy) on my left and Allie Johnston on my right. I am currently taking a Coca Cola Classic into my bodily system. We are working on an assignment of which we are doing a terrible job. most likely because I am doing a blog as opposed to actually helping them.

Words of Wisdom for the day:

"So are we gonna staple these together?
-Fiona Lubega

2005-02-08T18:12:00.000-06:00

Put some new stuff up on my dmusic site.

Enjoi

kevinKirkpatrick

Not dead!

Summer is over.

To Sum It All Up...

I am turning into Ermin Webster.

Daft E-Mail

It's Summertime

untitled swift current project

Bleach Bypass REMIX

So Today At Work... (Part 2)

The Future

I didn't know which side to root for.

A Stretch.

So Today At Work...

Hilarious Anecdote

Your new version of Blogger is ready!

The Show Must Go On...

I know Devon still reads this, at least.

'the haps'

"Keep the change, yah filthy animal."

Update!

Title

You stink

untitled

Why spend your life making someone else's dreams?

Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb

I'm a loser

Told yah so.

(none)

"it rocked my balls off"

I have a blog?

manohman

a thousand monkeys typing on a thousand typewriters

na-NO!

abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor abhor

...give it to us!

such pretty skin...

131

Guest Entry the second by FUZZY BLUMPKIN****

The Dire Case of Soya Sauce

Albert & Wright

fourteen one thousand...

thirteen one thousand...

twelve one thousand...

eleven one thousand...

ten one thousand...

nine one thousand...

eight one thousand...

seven one thousand...

six one thousand...

five one thousand...

four one thousand...

three one thousand...

two one thousand...

one one thousand...

Two interesting

g33k

Well *I* thought it was worth posting about

I guess

So I

It never fails

Why don't I just start a whole blog where all I do is list things?

a follow-up

One of Many

The Big One Seven

Sadly

Guess who's coming out with a CD this week?

100 things

join us...

numanuma biznitches

we'd ask them often...

A say-wha?

Lately this...

My Weekend

Tapped out (of ideas)

oh no

hurray-ah for me-ah

Hurray for my mom!

EPIC

Vultures In Vivid Colour

Well I thought it was worth posting about