Brian turned the corner out of the alley hastily, knocking some old woman carrying a bag of tomatoes down, probably cracking a hip, the old broad. He ran for all he was worth, as fast you can at high noon on a sidewalk without being polite. Dodging into openings people gave him, lacing himself futher into the lumbering mass of people, working his way inwards, anything to get away from what he had seen.

I mean, how could you not run like that, after a life-altering experience like that? He'll never dream the same again, Brian. His overpowering fear to get the hell away from the alley didn't cause him to overshoot his judgement, if he knocked someone over and fell with him, he wouldn't be gaining much.

His hightops slowly started thumping more and more now that he was away from the crowd, and he didn't have to dodge the hindering people. He was winded, sure, but nothing so tempting as stopping to rest is good enough to get away from the sights he certainly didn't wish to see in the alley. While Brian was running his mind conjured up a childhood memory supressed by age. His brain snapped him back to when he was eight years old watching Sesame Street. He was seated on the terrible shag carpet in his parents living room, in front of the tv, with his neck craned up, goggling the television with the adoration of a cult member. He remembered a scene with Bert and Ernie, bickering over something or another, while his parents were playing a sadistic game of follow-the-leader in the next room. Brian remembered the walls in that house being pretty thin.

He snapped back to the reality of what he was doing.This was certainly no time to be digging up memories of his hated childhood. His feet carried him past fifth, and onto sixth, there was almost noone to get in the way of his less-than-approved marathon. Even though there wasn't a soul to run into, Brian was still afraid to look over his shoulder for fear he would run into something and fall down. That certainly would not be wanted, even with the terror of it being right behind him.

With his body into a constant state of movent, even though Brian was afraid like he had never been before, his mind still wandered to memories long forgotten. Probably he was thinking all this up because of the inevitability of it all. Brian thought back to his first date, even though his father had embarassed him enough talking to his date(her name was Carol) on the phone, and at the door, and in the car, Brian was still afraid of the oppostie sex almost as much as he was running his death marathon. He remembered sitting in the back of his dad's 1958 Plymouth Fury, with Carol sitting on the other side of the car. Brian smiled sheepishly back at her, his cheeks rosy as heck from nervousness. She smiled back. They were just going to the cinema, probably just watch a few cartoons and then Brian would find his dad hanging around at the bar down the street and head 'er on home. But nonetheless, Brian was nervous as heck. He reached his hand along the autumn red upholstery and she reached towards his. Brian looked at the rearview mirror and his dad was glaring back at him furiously. But Brian didn't care.

Snapping back, Brian almost physically flinched from forcing his mind to present day. Ninth was coming up. This will all be over soon, Brian thought. Either I'll die in the end from all the running, or my run will end with me dying. A nice thought, I thought. What was that from? Some poem, probably. People standing by at this point saw a grin flash across the face of the strange man running, with sweat pouring off of him, looking utterly exhausted.
How long could a person run for? Brian continued his thinking, I'm in pretty good shape for my age. Hell, I'm in damn good shape. I'm certainly no olympic marathon runner, but I think I can still make it. What was up with that thing in the alley anyway? Nope, don't think back to that Brian. Whatever you do. Just keep running. That's the only solace you can grant yourself at this point. Brian groaned, another memory was bubbling up to his consciousness. He was so close, but I suppose three time's the charm.

Now this particular memory didn't have any consistency at all with the other memories, or even with his marathon. Which made it all the more cherishable as his last memory he ever had.

He remembered back to his graduation. It was the happiest day of his life. He was sitting between his two best friends(because the seating was done alphabetically. Rory Maffenbauer, Brian McDonald, James Nicholson), just the biggest grins on their faces. They were getting the last speech of four. This was the big one. Brian thought back to how he wasn't the least bit nervous, Rory and Jim were both jittery as junebugs nearing the end. All at once the graduating class of 219 students stood up, and with pride shining out their eyes, they flipped their tassels as one, from the right side to the left.

Brian actually studder-stepped this time. He couldn't forget where he was, he can't afford to double take a step again. Tenth arose with all it's gutter glory. Amongst all the broken-down homes that looked too much like the ones where Brian grew up in, stood out in a ray of magnifcence, of what had to be the least kept bridge in the city. For the rest of them time Brian ran in his life, he ran with a smile once he passed the street sign marking tenth.

There was a tree of sweat on his back, and his armpits were absolutely entrenched in sweat. This must be the luckiest day of my life, Brian thought, I hardly ever wear shorts, but I am today. However, unlucky for Brian, he never was one for tyeing his shoes on every time he put them on, just sort of slipped them on. So during the entire run of Brian's death marathon, his shoes had been flopping quite lazily against his feet. It was only thorugh the course of sheer, dumb luck, that Brian hadn't twisted an ankle or stepped on one of his shoelaces. For his troubles he had developed quite a severe case of blisters, but that doesn't matter.

After Brian got on the bridge, and launched himself over the pedestrians barrier, Brian's first step after that can be counted as his tenth last step in his life. On his ninth step, Brian kept going with the determination he had set out with. On the eighth step, Brian's smile momentarily flickered. On his seventh step, Brian brought his mind back to what he has seen in the alley. His sixth step was slightly slower than all the rest he had been taking. His fifth step was noticabled slower than the rest he had been taking. His fourth step, Brian remembered what it was exactly he had been running from, and mentally slapped his forhead, because now it was too late to do it physically. By his third step Brain realized just what he had been planning to do since he started running. His second step he ever took in his life was more of a skid really, Brian had stuck his heel down, trying to stop his momentum. On the last step Brian McDonald ever took for the rest of his life, he was at the edge of the bridge, where he had been intending with all the will in his life to run off of. Brian's momentum at this point was too much to go back on, and he swung his arms in what could be viewed as a comical manner, if you didn't know that he was 300 feet above ice cold water, on edge of the asphalt. From the time it took from his fourth step, Brian came to the sudden realization that he didn't even know what he was running from anymore, and that was the scariest thing of all.

The climax of Brian's death marathon was quite mundane. Since he was trying to slow down against all that momentum, when Brian went off the edge, his feet were in front of him, leaving Brian at a severe angle, almost lying down in fact. Brian had slowed down, so gravity had more effect on his fall than his momentum, not giving his much distance away fromt he bridge. Thus, Brian hit the back of his head against the side of the bridge, knocking him unconscious, leaving him oblivious to his death.

"He was not a monster. At least... I don't think he was."
-Christine by Stephen King

"'There it is, Mike,' Regina said, 'and you're going to drive right by it, just like you do every time we come here.'
Michael grunted and turned into the driveway, 'I saw it,' he said in the perpetually defensive tone he always seemed to use around his wife. He's a donkey, Arnie though. She talks to him like a donkey, she rides him like a doonkey, and he brays like a donkey.
'You're smiling again,' Regina said.
'I was just thinking about how much I love you both.' Arnie said. His father looked at him, surprised and touched; there was a soft gleam in his mother's eyes that might have been tears.
They really believed it.
The shitters."
-Christine by Stephen King

"In a world quite similiar, although different, of our own. There is a power, not the unseen powers you worship and praise every Sunday. Although this power is unseen in a way. With churning presence, striking fear in small children, and unease in the most dangerous of men. Everyone feels it, although none know of it's origin or it's whereabouts. Everyone knows it's simply there. If this power were to stop being, everyone would know, feel an emptiness of unsettlement. On some days people feel this, not that the power is quite gone, but gone in a sense. They feel it's restlessness, as if destined for more somehow. No one can explain it quite further than this. The power... exists. From a newborn child to a death-stricken old man. The presence is there from their first breath to their last. Why, if this presence were to fail, or, not exist anymore. Who knows what would happen?"
-From a short story I had written awhile back

1. Go into your blogs archives.
2. Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.


"No, I don't really hate my parents."

Well yesterday marked what is sure to be one of the most memorable days of my life. Yesterday I was graced with watching... SHAUN OF THE DEAD!!!

Shaun of the Dead... the name of which to strike fear into the heart of men and women to scream in delight. There is no par to Shaun of the Dead. Only once in a lifetime can you get such an impression witnessing such a spectacular feature film. Don't miss it... Don't miss it...

One.
More.
Freakin'.
Day.
Until.
Shaun.
Of.
The.
Freakin'.
Dead.

Guest Entry by Stephen Cochrane
Unbelievable!!

Guest Entry by Jason Laverdiere
i laughed i cryed i died

Guest Entry by Karen McDonald
This movie was even better than listening to brandon wiebe talking about oral sex!!

Guest Entry by Joel Kenneth Dryden
i wuv shawn of the ded

Guest Entry by Savannah Schultz
Hurrah for Shaun of the Dead! How i truly anticipate viewing it's greatness! Oh how I lust for zombies!!

Oh yes, that thing what that guy who wanted to beat me up has blown over. *whew*

I'm working on some engish(not a typo, I always refer to english as engish), eating some chunky soup, havin' a Pepsi, when the realization struck me. Only two more days until Shaun of the Dead comes out! Holy crap! I can't believe it, I've been anticipating this movie since I posted that review.
Until this day, it seemed like a pipe dream, of which was an awesome dream, but was just too far away for me to grasp. But they day is almost freaking here!!! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh!!!

Man chunky soup rules.

Today I get to dress up as Santa Claus for some kids christmas party, I hope none of them will have the revelations needed that tells them that Santa doesn't usually consist average size, average weight, unbelievably good-looking, in his teen years. But they're just kids after all.
I finished my christmas shopping/wrapping with the exception of two, for my mom and a certain lady-friend.
Last night I got to hang out with some friends whom I haven't seen for like five months as they've been away at college, it was so great to see them. We played some Donkey Konga, watched Dodgeball, it was awesome.

I remember not wanting to see Dodgeball in theatres because it looked like it just wouldn't do it for me, but it was actually quite hilarious. There was the obligatory physical humour, which doesn't take much(Jackass anyone?), and that of course I didn't really care for, although some of it I had to laugh at. But also I mean, there was the awesome kind of humour in conversations, which takes wit and timing and delivery. That's what makes humour. There was a bunch of cameo appearances, which usually makes a movie lame, but it worked by gum.

I think I'm gonna head 'er though, adios.

"On the way to gray, I could hardly wait to see you again, to feel your hands. Covering me till the storm is done. What seemed to be the end was not the end at all. When I hear the rain should I be afraid for my life? Why do you look at me that way. I told you that I was too busy to see you. I would never keep a secret from you. Is it over? I see there is not time to think selfishly. Yesterday's gone, tomrrow is here. Can't turn back now. I won't quit, I still love you. I swear, I always will."
-Emery, Secrets. Check them out here

Two more freaking days until Shaun of the Dead.

Here's a conversation I had not too long ago with a girl on msn...

hi
hey hey
what's up?
not a heckuva lot
yourself?
not much
been pretty bored all day
been busy lately?
well I got 7 penis enchancment emails since yesterday
so I'd have to say I've been on my toes the last little while
which are what?
you don't know what penis enchancment is?
nope
uuh
do you know what a penis is
well yah
well alright, now imagine one being.. ENCHANCED
lol... junkmail?
yes
well then i really wouldn't care much

Girls suck. 3 more days until Shaun of the Dead!!!

Right now the inside of my mouth feels like sandpaper that has been dipped in molasses or something. My cheeks are kind of swollen, just enough so my braces can grip them and tear the skin, freaking lovely. If you haven't guessed yet, I'm eating sour skittles. I had quite an eventful afternoon, but a dwindling evening, it looks like it'll pick up at like 11:30 though. Which is an hour away... Oh! I should watch some music videos, those rule undoubtedly. Man I just can't get enough of some videos if it's well directed. I know I've went over this before, but seriously, I can never get tired of videos or movies if they rock at directing. Note Of Interest: I found out that Christopher Columbus directed Home Alone. I used to love Home Alone because Macaulay Culkin's character name was Kevin. Kevin McCallister. McCallister is almost a cool of a last name as Kirkpatrick. Too bad Macaulay Culkin is in the movie Saved! or whatever it's called. I haven't seen it, but I know he sucks in it because on the cover he looks like a chauch.

I think I'll be going now, just thought I'd keep you on the DL. Four more days until Shaun of the Dead comes out on DVD.

"Let me explain something to you, whenever you come in here and interupt me you're breaking my concentration, you're distracting me. And it will then take me time to get back to where I was. Understand? I'm not being grouchy, I just want to finish my work."
-My friend used this in one of songs he makes on his computer, but I don't know where he got it from. (check it out at Zealot Coalition)

""'You sonofabitch!' he cried out in startled anger, and kicked the dog again, this time hard enough to send it rolling in the dust. He advanced on the dog once more, kicked it again, still yelling. Now the dog, eyes watering, nose in fiery agony, one rib broken and another badly sprung, realized its danger from this madman, but it was too late.
Greg Stillson chased it across the dusty farmyard, panting and shouting, sweat rolling down his cheeks, and kicked the dog until it was screaming and barely able to drag itself along through the dust. It was bleeding in half a dozen places. It was dying.
'Shouldn't have bit me,' Greg whispered. 'You hear? You hear me? You shouldn't have bit me, you dipshit dog. No one gets in my way. You hear? No one.'"
-The Dead Zone by Stephen King

"As he made tea he thought he heard a rustle from next door, and went to check. It was completely empty. Remarkably so, he thought later on. It was almost as if it was even more empty than it would be if there was just, well, no one in it."
-Night Watch by Terry Pratchett

"your beauty is one to be sought after, like a princess in a fairy tale. Your loveliness makes strong willed men suffer, and the lesser willed weep. Your eyes are the most outstanding thing about you, one can never stop looking you in the eyes. Your eyes are the stainless reflections of your soul. I could fall in love in your eyes"
-A poem I wrote on command for a girl

"I SEX BRANDOn W"
-What the letters spell on my fridge right now.


Alright, Shaun of the Dead is coming out in 5 days! I can watch a good 4 zombie movies in that time to tide me over. Man Shaun of the Dead rules.

As I should PROBABLY make clear, it's not that I hate Brandon Wiebe and try to make him less than me or anything, it's just easy and lots of fun to pick on him. I'm crueless. It should go without saying that I love the little guy, I think he's awesome, but when he's a chauch, he's like the biggest chauch ever. But hey, I'm not perfect eitheryesIam.

Well the big news of the last couple of days would have to be that a certain person I know wants to beat me up for making out with his girlfriend before they went out. Over 6 months ago. She told him that I forced her to or whatever. That's a load of BS, but I never see this guy pretty much everyday, so avoiding him will be easy. He won't know I'm avoiding him, unless he reads this. That's a pretty discouraging thought. To all you people who read this blog at all; don't go sending this address around until I have informed you it has blown over! It would be vastly appreciated. Unless you're one of those dicks who get pleasure form making people suffer.

Since everyone got to say something nice about Kalin in his blog, I'm going to say something nice here:

Kalin, you don't know it, but in math class, I smell your hair and pick the loose threads off your shirt when you're not looking. In my math binder I have a paper with your name in hearts around them. You know I love you! lol!

To end with some good news, for new years ever I'm going to Winnipeg for a rave. How awesome is that?

Well now that I'm freaking paranoid of posting this blog entirely, I'm gonna go get some shut eye and listen to my newest music album. Farewell.

Brandon Wiebe Sucks At Being Funny and/or Typing: An Analysis

-The original biography can be found at http://www.supplyanddemand.tk-*Please note; I had to copy this by reading it, so there might be some very small errors, but personally, I don't think they're going to be noticed by anyone. The italics are my comments, Brandon Wiebe's words are in bold to make it more appealing to the eye.*

Brandon Wiebe
plays |Didn't capitalize 'plays'| and does backing vocals(screaming) |no purpose for the paranthesis|, guitar- ibanez ax120gn, amp-crate 120watts, effects pedals- digitech rp50(not used much) |If it's not used much, is it worth mentioning in the first place? Once again, no purpose for paranthesis| and one w/ |Lazy. Is it really hard to add two extra characters? Congratulations, you saved yourself 1/8 of a second typing|. amp |All these stats are totally meaningless, you're not even signed for cryin' out loud|. "marital" |Didn't capitalize 'marital', no reason for quotation marks| status: taken by the beautiful sam reimer |Didn't capitalize your OWN GIRLFRIEND'S NAME|. hobbies |Didn't capitalize 'hobbies'|: youth, church, deeper, "hanging out" |No purpose whatsoever for the quotation marks|, buying stuff |Thanks for the needless, unbelievably broad, unendingly general statement|, freestyle skiing, wearing tight pants, eating cherry pie filling (cold)|No purpose YET AGAIN for paranthesis|, keeping the spotlight away from joel|Didn't capitalize 'Joel'|. fun|Didn't capitalize 'fun'| facts: none|Completely meaningless|. favourite|Didn't capitalize 'favourite'| bands: underoath, the used, dead poetic, cure for silence, your bleeding heart, emery, blindside, thousand foot krutch (more of a "previous favourite band"|No need for quotation marks|),|Why bother mentioning them at all? Regardless, why do you have to get the point across that you only liked them before, and not anymore? Isn't the title of this point "favourite bands'?| |Didn't capitalize any of the bands up to this point| mewithoutYou, etc |Etcetera? What is that supposed to mean? I don't know how you can expect to let people know something about you if you put 'etc' on your list 'favourite bands'|. sidenote |Didn't capitalize 'sidenote'|: the coke jacket is a thing of beauty, unfortunately it is in most pictures on this site, please do not get the impression that it is my only item of clothing, which it is not. ____ists: i |couldn't be bother to capitalize one letter to refer to your ownself?| am a bassist (meaning a racist towards bassists, i |Read previous note| dont |No apostrophe| play bass)|No need for paranthesis|. adieu |Didn't capitalize 'adieu'| |Didn't put a finishing period!|

However, I must give credit where credit is due. I'm glad that he didn't once type favourite as 'favorite'. As well as he spelled unfortunately correct, that one gets most people.All this from the guy who doesn't like Brent Isaak because Brent used to go out with his girlfriend.


More to come after this!

I know I haven't updated in like a month, but this couldn't wait, I'll tell you more about my life and what's going on if you're THAT interested in a few days. I promise.